Read my eyes

chapter one

So Yeah. ... welcome i guess :D

*Ding Dong*

i walked to the door and laughed so hard because i almost fell over the carpet. Finally made it to the door.  well done cabello now you just need to open it.

Oh. that was easy

"..You are amazing. You know that?" I said  instead of a normal 'Hey babe' "Nononono. Let me correct that. You are amazcorn. No wait... unimazing. Yeah. Unimazing..."

-Silence-

"Get it? Amazing & unicorn. ..?"

-silence-

i got a little bit angry because he did it again. Giving me this 'look' which says something like "stop talking. You've got red eyes we all know that they aren't red because you've cried." I could slam the door in his face right now.

"Ugh! I'm sorry okay?!" I almost shouted the 'okay'

"Okay?!" Yay. Finally a response. "YOU THINK THAT THIS IS STILL OK?!" Oh fuck. "OUR RELATIONSHIP IS STILL OK?!! YOUR ADDICTIONS ARE STILL OKAY!?!! NO CAMILA! NOTHING'S OKAY ANYMORE! YOU KNEW THAT I WOULD COME OVER TODAY AND WHAT HAPPENS?! RIGHT! CAMILA IS SNOOP D 1.2" Dan almost exploded. Haha lol. He looks like a tomato which blushed. I laughed at this thought and realised that Dan heard it. His eyes widned as he spoke "Look bea..." yup. i can almost smell where this 'talk' is going to end. "I tried to fix this. To fix us. But mostly i gave my best to fix you. I reeeaaally did so don't think i never ment what i said and that everything i did was a lie but... look... i'm honest to you. I've always been so listen........ It's........ over.... I still love you. Like the old you. You've changed since you meet that one girl and i accepted it. Til now."

I could almost hear his heart aching because of the breaking causing those tears falling down his soft cheeks and i suddenly felt numb realizing he wasn't playing nor joking.

"...But Dan... You can't... like. No."

He wasn't crying alone anymore. 

"Call me when your eyes are not red,  your breathe doesn't smell like ciggarets and you are sober. I love you. I always did. I just don't know if i will in the future" He turned around and wanted to go but i grabbed his wrist to tell him that i wanted him to stay. He just stood there a few seconds but then turned his head so i could see the half of his face. Dan's lips were a small line. His eyes wide opened without blinking. Just crying. "I'm sorry Daniel" I spoke out truthfully and saying his full name to make him notice that i'm not joking neither. Nothing but silence and extremly silent sobing but loud sniffing though.

"...anything new to say? If so... tell me."

I hated myself for hurting him this bad. Making him crying,  feeling this horrible pain.

"Please. Tell me if i can fix this. I don't want to loose you and i can't loose you!" I begged.

Dan turned around facing me now. His blue eyes were unreadable and his black little curls were such a mess.

"This is the fourth time. I always tried to fix it. You just let me do the work alone for us both. No. Camila."

I nodded. Fought back my tears. Bit my bottom lip. Pressed my eyes and hugged him one last time knowing i won't see him anymore because he will be gone tomorrow. He is always gone if there are problems.  Dan is a person who runs from his problems veryyyy faaar awaaayy.   Somewhere. Just his bike and Dan. Gladly my hug was accepted. We let go after about fifteen seconds and Dan then turned around to walk to his bike. Before he sat on it he mouthed 'THANK YOU' and then put his helmet on and left me there alone. I knew what he thanked me for. it wasn't sarcastic or something like that it was because he always thought that i'd leave him. But I NEVER DID.

So... i'm crying right now. I've lost my handsome and creative boyfriend Dan a few minutes ago and i'm still high as fuck because of the blunt with Dinah 2 hours ago. That's a pretty loud call for a ciggaret and a drink darling.

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×o my god.  Tell me what you think, what i should change and if you like it or nah.×