Letter to my Crush

Dear Crush,

 I really don't know how to start this, but I like you. I get a weiand feeling of wanting to be with you almost every day, and it's scaring me. These feeling that I don't know how to control are basically writing this letter. So the best way of therapy (in my opinion)is to talk it out, not that I'm actually gonna send it to you.

The day I first met you I already categorized you as an egocentric jerk. With a typical, handsome look that was made for girls to swoon, and the way you walked and talked. It showed confidence, arrogance even. You knew that you could get all the girls you could ever want. I stayed away, I refrained myself. But sometimes I just couldn't stop but admire.

 You drove me crazy when you smiled. You had a dimple on both cheeks and when your shoulders were broad and firm. You weren't those buff men. But instead, you had a lean waist and a even better face. But in actuality, looks were just a bonus. But what I really like is your attitude. You were outgoing, friendly and normal. I really liked that about you and that is what made me fall for you at first. 

I tried to keep the same way. But there are certain times when I would unconsciously go and move closer, like going in the same room as you. I knew that if I did anything outright and obvious I would become more of a laughing stock then I already am.  I was different and people knew it, on top of that I knew it. Then in a few weeks, you got a girlfriend, a person I knew didn't like me. So how would a girl like me ever go along with a boy like you?

I wasn't the girl to fantasize but I knew I had to do it, for certain purposes. So I wrote about a perfect dream date. It was where we would go to an amusement park. I would run and be my usual weird me, while you laughed and chased me around. I didn't like those cliche rides where the boy takes the girl onto the Ferris wheel and they would kiss. I was thinking of us going in a roller coaster riding our hearts out until we got tired. Then eating cotton candy afterward with big grins on our faces. It would be perfectly imperfect because that is what a date that people usually wouldn't do (At least in the books and movies. It was different, and I liked different. That ridiculous hope died when I saw you holding hands with your girlfriend.

 I knew I shouldn't have the paper, but I kept it anyway, it was a reminder to me of how I was someone who isn't allowed to have a perfect dream date. I was someone different, and that alone defined me.

Love, Me