I am building blocks.
Now you might not understand but that is ok, I'm willing to explain.
I am building blocks because I am built up and knocked down. Of course you can always build them up again but once that happens, they are knocked down again. Building blocks have letters on each block and children play with them so sometimes, they just make a word like KLWN. Of course that is not a word. Or is it? No-one understands that word, not even the one who made it. The child. However, that is my point. No-one understands what that person is going through, no-one understands what they have done, no-one understands them. Not even themselves. They are ambiguous. I am ambiguous.
Building blocks can also be a victim and can be manipulated.
If a child in a fit of rage or in an experiment was to throw a building block, they can hurt it. A rag doll. But straight after they can continue playing properly with it. This is where it is manipulated or they are. They were just shown hate but now they are being shown love. They feel pressured to not tell anyone of the pain they have just been caused because They are scared of losing the only love they have. They are being manipulated but They wouldn't understand. After all They are noting but an innocent child's toy, right? They are ambiguous. I am ambiguous.
Building blocks can also be the criminal and can manipulate. Building blocks say that it is what's inside that counts but inside some building blocks, anger is stored. They feel a deep hatred as a voice tells them to hurt who they can as much as they hurt themselves but another voice drifts them away from this. Forgiveness of who caused them the pain but no, they always try and keep the anger in. But you must remember that anger is a secondary emotion. It is caused by something else. They felt something else before they got angry. The building blocks were upset, confused, jealous. The building blocks throw themselves at the wall, chip themselves with small sharp objects or the corners of the coffee table, they disconnect with building blocks of the same make as they believe that their creation made all the bad stuff happen and hurt them yet love them too. They are confused as to why they sometimes manipulate who they claim to love but realize it is because the building blocks owners manipulated them for so long, that they truly don't understand love nor friendship. They want someone to trust fully in them within a relationship yet know, they may never have full trust in the other building block in the relationship. They may manipulate them knowing they can. They don't mean to do this but a voice says they should because they have the power to, because, everyone else does. They are ambiguous. I am ambiguous.
Building blocks can educate. Sometimes building blocks can spell out words once you get to know them and get use to them. They have the potential to educate you but building blocks can't talk. They don't have a voice. They are so busy not trying to be a burden to others that they tend to just keep to themselves. Not tell people their view on the world, the monsters in it. The monster in the mirror. They would rather keep quiet, like they have done most of their life because once again,they are in fear of losing the only love they have. They are silent. Oh so silent.
Building blocks can be in their own. A loner, separated from the other building blocks. It can go anywhere it wants, well restricted of course as there is only so much room in a house. Most of the time, the building block is lonely as it goes to its happy place. The park. A very specific park. But everytime the building block goes on the one swing there, a crow always seems to go on the other equipment, lurking, stalking the building block. However, the building block can also feel alone when with other building blocks as they don't seem to fit in the puzzle. By owner, they are seen with other building blocks therefore, not alone but alas they feel alone. They feel like they should just leave. It wouldn't make much difference to the other building blocks but... The building block refuses to just leave without explaining why. This is because a close building block of theirs did that to them, and they got angry at the building block. Trust gone. Why have trust to begin with? It has only let them down. The building block will just stay quiet. Though consumed by fire which burns then and sets them alight, though consumed by water, which drowns them. They will stay quiet. They don't want to be a burden. To cause a fight or destruction. They are quite ambiguous about why they do this. What is in it for this one specific building block? They are ambiguous. I am ambiguous.
Building blocks can have chips in them. This can show the damage they have been caused, battle scars one could say. But building blocks are only an innocent child's toy that are later thrown away and eventually forgot about. Hidden in a box, trapped inside the dark, no way out. They have no voice and they are scared of losing the only ones that love them, they are ambiguous and hurting. I am ambiguous and hurting.
I am noting but a toy.
I am building blocks.
