A/N:
Okay, I honestly have no clue what the fuck I'm doing help me-
°°°
"Hypothetically speaking, would you believe me if I told you Gato's planning to kill you off once we've weakened you?" Akari asked. Zabuza stared at her for a moment.
"Hypothetically speaking, I would decide that after I find out whether or not the source you got that information from is reliable." He replied.
"Also hypothetically speaking, what if I told you that I calculated this outcome myself?"
"Also hypothetically speaking, I would probably believe you, since you've never calculated anything wrong before."
"Okay," Akari said. "Gato's planning to kill you off once we've weakened you."
Zabuza stared at her.
"Bruh."
°°°
"Plan?" Zabuza asked Akari. She shrugged.
They were currently preparing to murder the fuck out of Gato and his men. The others, Kakashi, Tazuna, Naruto, Sasuke, and Sakura, were heading back for Tazuna's house. Haku was trailing them.
Zabuza mentally facepalmed. Why did he even ask? She never strategized for mass annihilation. She could fucking burn the place down in one go, or electrocute them all. Considering she didn't give two shits about how low her chakra got during fights, much less one, this was a very plausible outcome. That, or she would give some sort of half-assed answer like 'wing i-.
"I dunno. Wing it. That's how mafia works."
Zabuza sighed.
°°°
Zabuza was lowkey scared of Akari now. She had just ripped two-thirds of Gato's men in half with nothing but a tanto.
While writing a mission report to the Hokage.
How the fuck does someone do that? How did she write on a scroll without a surface to do so on? Scrolls don't just fucking float conveniently in the air for someone to write on! Where did she get the fucking pen from? Better yet, when did she even have time to take the fucking scroll out? Bullshittery!
Plus, wasn't Kakashi supposed to write the mission report? When the fuck did she start doing that? Half a decade ago, she was a blunt asshole around people she knew, and a fucking stuttering mess around people she didn't! Now, she's basically the fucking reincarnation of Satan! Better yet, who the fuck told her about that? She's more dirty-minded than Kakashi, and he openly reads porn in public!
But all he could do was let out a low whistle and a 'Damm Daniel'.
°°°
"Recite one more meme or vine and we're not getting dango anymore," Sasuke muttered, glaring daggers at Akari.
"It's fucking approved!"
"That's it, we're heading back."
"This car? Gucci."
"The fuck is a car?"
°°°
Kakashi heard yelling inside of Akari's room, so he decided to check on her and poked his head inside her room.
And instantly pulled it back out, pretending he saw nothing.
"YOU CHEATED! YOU FUCKING CHEATED!"
"No, I didn't. It's not my problem you're crap at speed."
"WHY YO-"
"DON'T TALK TO SASUKE-KUN LIKE THAT!"
"...we stan a queen."
"Bitch."
"Lasagna."
There was a moment of silence.
"BITCH LASAGNA, BITCH LASAGNA, LOOK AT T-SERIES, THEY JUST WETTIN' THEIR PAJAMAS! BITCH LASAGNA, BITCH LASAGNA, T-SERIES AIN'T NOTHING BUT A BITCH LASAGNA!"
Kakashi found himself quietly mumbling the lyrics.
"Who the hell is Bob, and, why you wanna kiss him? (ew)."
°°°
"You knew Akari from before?" Kakashi asked, taking a seat next to Zabuza. He nodded in confirmation.
"I met her about 5 years ago. She hasn't changed much on the inside." Zabuza mused.
"And what do you mean with that statement?" Kakashi inquired.
"A soul pure as snow is one thing that's stubbornly stayed the same for her despite how hopeless reality is." He answered. Kakashi stayed silent.
don't kill me.
I have this crippling thing called writer's block.
sorry for the short chapter.
YOU ARE READING
Goodbye
Fanfiction(A Naruto Fanfic) Red. That was all she could see. Blood. So much...blood... Her hands were coated in blood. Her parents were lying in a pool of blood. The katana that belonged to the murderer of her parents was slick with blood. Blood...everywhere...
