"Never Leaving You Behind."

CHAPTER 1

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Intro; Hey there! It's my first ever phanfic so I hope you enjoy this reading!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

(Phil P.O.V.)

It's 6am. I hear Dan walking around his room. What's he doing now? Why can't he just go back to sleep? He's thinking deeply again, now isn't he? Ugh... I just hope he can get put of his 'existential crisis.' I'm tired of seeing him being traumatized by his own thoughts. I question the meaning of life myself, but I don't react the same way he does. I noticed he has been acting weird. Now being weird is great, because being normal will cause sadness. But he hasn't been himself lately. He has been a bit rude, sensitive, and just... unusual. I caught him outside the balcony, and he wasn't just admiring the view- he was about to JUMP OFF. I pulled him back and yelled at him. He looked pretty confused and scared. And just the other day, while I was eating his cereal (secretly), he got really, really, really, mad. He punched my arm quite hard and I defended myself by pinning him against the wall. He's never violent, and I don't like this at all, I don't like pinning him against the wall. I cried for him. I worry. What if he won't be back to his own self? I want my Dan back. My best friend back. Why has he gone? Dan??? Come back. Let me help y- *CRASH* What was that sound?! It came from Dan's room... "AAARGHHHHHH!" DAN!!!

(Dan's P.O.V.)

It's 5:30am. I can't sleep. I had been getting these nightmares lately... I dreamt of Phil leaving me because he just couldn't handle me anymore. I had this other dream of Phil insulting me and threatening me. Anyone but Phil wouldn't do this. But it seemed so realistic... I also had this dream in which I wasn't able to accomplish anything. I lived life doing nothing. The "existential crisis" is really getting to me now. It's affecting me pretty badly as well, like my moods and reactions, human interactions and what not. I was about to jump off the balcony just to see if it was going to be painful or not, I have started to get pretty violent. I have been walking around my bedroom for nearly a half hour now. I was just getting better and now I totally hate myself. No Dan, don't say that. You know better than not to say that. Remember what Phil said... Phil... It's 6am. Whenever I think about Phil... I have this warm feeling, this happy, amazing feeling... But it's strange. I love his smile, his laugh, his sense of humor, his personality... Is it possible that I am now, questioning my sexuality?! What if I die without knowing? Without love? Without having someone by your side?? What if I end up all alone?? I'm going to end up alone... No Phil... I feel like bursting into tears now... I am a horrible person... No you're not... You'll end up all alone... No you won't... No one loves you... that's not...true... Next thing I know, I have hit the glass frame- picture of Phil & I at our first ever Vidcon... Oh god... What am I doing in life... "ARGGHHHH!" I scream out. I can't take anymore of this. Phil rushes in my bedroom. "DAN?!"