More than friends: A Kyungsoo Fanfiction

Chapter 12.2

" What happened to her ?", you heard Kyungsoo asking from outside as you sat up in the white hospital bed.

" She asked me to tell you herself. I'll give you some time alone. ", the doctor said.

Kyungsoo came in and closed the door behind him.

" Before you start worrying, it's nothing serious. The doctor said that I collapsed because I overworked myself lately and I just didn't want you to freak out when he uses all that latin stuff. However it's no surprise since I was working on that exhibition like a maniac."

He sighed.

" That's a relief."

" I just need a little rest. I'm sorry that I caused such a mess. "

" It's okay. I'm glad that you're fine. I booked a new flight for the evening, it was no deal. "

He sat down next to you.

" Since we have time now, there's something else I wanted to tell you. "

" What is it ? "

" Sooyun and I got divorced a few months ago. I know telling you this I'm looking like a complete...-"

" I know. "

" Wait... you knew it ? "

" Sooyun told me today. "

" I knew she couldn't let it go. I'm sorry I didn't tell you earlier. I didn't want you to think that I wouldn't care about Nari. But the divorce seemed to relieve her more than it confused her. "

" She did have a hard time with you two always fighting. "

" She did. But she always had a good time when you were around. She loves you Y/N. "

You smiled.

" I know. "

" And I... love you too. "

You looked at him confusedly, since it was weird that he used a full sentence, but then laughed a little.

" As your best friend, I love you too Kyungsoo."

" No, not like this. As a man. I love you. "

You looked at him and your heartbeat increased in no time.

" I wanted to tell you after that year abroad, when I would be home again... But I just can't wait any longer. "

" Why are you telling me this right now ? "

" Because I'm tired of hesitating, Y/N. I want to hug you... and kiss you... and live with you. God, I want to make love to you. I want to have kids with you. And grow old with you. "

You took a deep breath.

" When Sooyun talked to me she gave me this. "

You gave him his letter. He unfolded it and looked at you as he recognized it.

" You... read this ? I didn't know she still had it."

You nodded.

" I really felt this way. I didn't want you to get married to someone else and that was when I first realized how i feel about you. Nothing about my feelings has changed. But why did you come running to the airport... with this ? "

" Because I... "

" Could it be that you... ? "

" I came to tell you to let go of me. "

" What ? "

" After I read the letter I knew that you would keep waiting for me. But this love that you want to give me... I can't return it. "

" What are you talking about ? "

" Whatever you think you are feeling... I'm not the one for you. "

When you looked him in the eyes you expected him to be hurt. But all you saw was determination.

„ No. I won't accept this. I know that we're supposed to be more than friends. I can make you happy. I know my life isn't simple, quite the opposite. But if that's the reason why you're scared we can fix this. I will work hard for you to make you smile."

„ Just stop it !"

„ If you really don't love me, then why can't you look me in the eyes when telling me ?"

You looked up to him.

„ I don't love you. Not like this."

„I think you're lying."

„ Don't you get it ! I don't want you ! Do you think I see you as a man ? You're a failure to me. You messed up your marriage. Twice ! You were involved in a drug scandal ! So tell me, Kyungsoo. How could I be with someone like you ? Is your love enough to cover this ?"

He looked at you. Now... hurt.

„Exactly.", you said.

„ That's how you see me ?"

„ I wish you would have sent this letter to me nine years ago. I would have rejected you back then."

You threw the letter at him.

„ I would have done this... To reject your useless feelings."

„ Why are you doing this... ?"

„ I tell you why. I thought you were my friend. But now... you're just hell of annoying Kyungsoo."

You turned your back to him.

„ I'm going to be in the states for a whole year. Can't you even look at me ?"

You tried to stay quiet when tears ran down your face.

„Can't you at least look at me ?"

You didn't say anything.

„ Look at me !"

„ You should go now."

For a moment there was nothing but silence. When you heard him closing the door you fell on the bed and started sobbing loudly.

You just wanted to be with Kyungsoo. You wanted to tell him that you loved him too. That you loved him to no end. But now it was too late. All the love you could give him would never be enough to cover the pain he would feel for the rest of his life when you would be gone.

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I guess I should apologize for the slow updates. The thing is... I'll be on a plane tomorrow to start my semester abroad, yeyyy ! I hope I'm gonna meet some nice people there. Really guys, I'm so nervous ! Still, this story will be completed. And since the main characters are getting older there are not many chapters left.