Prologue
Looking back, I can finally see how pathetic it was. There I lay, little seven year old Erick, in my little dinosaur pajamas laying on a bare bed. I was shaking like crazy because, like usual, mommy and daddy had refused to turn on the heater in my room. I hated to listen to my teeth chatter, so I clenched my jaw as hard as possible. After many minutes of laying in the fetal position I realized my body had stopped generating the heat that I rely on so heavily at night. I wondered if daddy would ever give me back the towel I used as a blanket. I didn't mean to spill the oatmeal.
The room was dark. The only light came from the streetlamp that always flickers an orange hue. Without looking in a mirror I could already tell my lips were turning purple. I wonder if I could die like this. Would I be frozen solid? I would hope that I wouldn't break in half if the police dropped me. I try really hard not to think about it. Instead I wonder how the fishing trip will go tomorrow. Daddy promised me he would take me. I wanted to bring Rover my doggy but he wasn't allowed to come. I wondered why my two cousins who were coming got to bring their dog. Maybe because I'm only seven.
Again, my attention is turned to the numbing of the tips of my fingers. I can't take much more of this. I try to keep my mind occupied by thinking of the fishing trip, but it doesn't work. Instead I cry myself to sleep.
*
It's the day of the camping trip. I'm so excited that I almost forget to feed Rover. I slowly walk myself to the pantry area where we keep the food, although I quickly regret this now, for daddy is doing laundry. I try to sneak away before he could see me, but I'm to late. "What do you think your doing, little brat!" He screams at me forcefully as he pulls me in towards him by the hair. Suddenly I was thrown against the side wall, inches from shattering the window. "Im sorry daddy I didn't mean to." I cried as a tear ran down my cheek. He just looked at me with his black potent eyes and yelled "Get out of here!"
Things like this happen all the time so im used to it. I know the routine.
I go as fast as I can to my room, or else, who knows what daddy might do to me. I sit on the edge of my bed staring out the window. It's a nice day outside. The sun is at its brightest and I can vaguely make out a hummingbird fly past the window. I watch as the neighbor boy and his sister play in their sandbox. I would really love to play with them, but im never allowed to talk to anyone if im not at school.
"Erick get into the truck, NOW, or I'll drag you by the ears." My dad shouts. I jump to my feet immediately. Getting drug by the ears is never fun. One time I even started bleeding.
I take the stairs two at a time. All I can think about is how much I want to catch a fish. It would make daddy so proud. Maybe he would even let me eat dinner.
My daydream is rudely interrupted when I do a face plant right into the door. I looked around to make sure no one saw, than ran to get into the truck.
I watch out the window as we drive past the hundreds of trees that mark the way to Aunt's house. Its amazing that every tree is a different shape. I wonder if God likes to paint different trees and make them into a masterpieces. I would hope that he would name them too. Maybe someday I could have him tell me all the names of the trees. I would try really hard to remember them all. Who knows, maybe he will let me name one of my own.
*
After what seems like forever we finally pull up to the rocky driveway of Aunt Mary's house. The smell of firewood wafted right to my nose. Out of the corner of my eye I can see the twins coming out of the screen door. I can't believe me eyes as I watch Michel and Jay come running out of the house to greet us. They look so grown up. The last time I saw them was two years ago when they were ten. Now they look like they could crush me. Someday I hope to be as tall as they are.
After we park I jump out of the truck like lightning. With each step I take I can feel the rocky grooves beneath my worn shoes.
"Erick, you've gotten so big!" Aunt Mary says to me as she wraps her arms protectively around me. A beating of the heart, breathing of the chest, and warmth that radiates off of her immediately sooths my soul. I can't even remember the last time mommy gave me a hug like this.
A few seconds went by until daddy interrupted. "We're going to the bait store for fish food okay, Erick? Why don't you stay here and we'll come back to get you, alright?" Dad says to me with his potent eyes that urged me to say okay. I can't understand why Michel and Jay get to go, but that's okay I can wait. I don't want to upset daddy. "Okay, Dad."
I watch as he turns around and heads back for the truck. A vibration from the engine tickles my ears as it roars to life like a lion that just awoke from a slumber. I can vaguely make out a gentle puff of smoke that rises from the exhaust pipe. Slowly backing up, the little red pickup truck gets smaller and smaller into the distance until finally not visible at all.
I turn to look at Aunt. It's still hard for me to understand that my dad and her are brothers and sisters. They don't look anything alike, such as their hair, their eye color, everything is different. Dad is a very gruff man, yet Aunt is like an angel waiting to sing at any moment. Sometimes I wonder if they were even raised my the same people.
"I was just about to make some cookies, Erick. Would you like to help me?"
"No. I think I'll just wait outside until Dad gets back from the bait shop." I reply. I can't help but daydream about what kind of bait or what colors Dad will buy. I really liked the ones that sparkle. I think that if I was a fish I would always go for the sparkly bait. It looks more appetizing.
Aunt Mary raised an eyebrow. "Okay, whatever you say, Bud, but if you need anything just give me a call. I'll be in the kitchen."
I sit.
I wait.
My back begins to hurt. Next my eyes start getting heavy. I fight the urge to fall asleep, yet I can feel my head drop a couple inches than pick itself up again. My entire body begins to ace until it became unbearable to move.
The next thing I know Aunt is shaking me back and forth. "Wake up, honey. You fell asleep waiting for your dad. Im sorry, Erick. He probably isn't coming back tonight."
What did she just say? Not coming back? We were going fishing today. I was gonna catch this biggest fish in the sea. Why would he just leave me here? Why would he take my cousins but not me? A rush of truth finally hits me like I just ran into the middle of a street. The only words that I can think at the moment is why not me?
