The Awesome Book of Hetalia Oneshots

A Pervert's Punishment... (Uke! France x Seme! England SMUT)

Based off of episode 11 of The Beautiful World (Season 5).

"Why do I have to dress like this?" England asked irritably, running a hand through his blond hair. France pranced around in front of him, wearing nothing but cat ears, a tail and a large red rose conveniently placed over the space in between his legs. France laughed heartily, his tail twitching from side to side happily. England wore a pale pink button-up shirt that was long enough to cling at his thighs, a couple of pens in the breast pocket; a nurse cap on top of his choppy blond hair. In his hand was a wand with a large yellow star at one end.

"Because it's April Fools' Day," France replied, poking him hard in the chest.

"Wrong, loser. This is the fault of a wanker," England glared at the naked Frenchman stood in front of him. He turned away and folded his arms over his chest. "I can't believe they've done it again."

"Done what?" America asked, wandering over. He was dressed in navy blue, formfitting shorts, a charcoal tie tied around his neck, resting on his bare chest, and brown bear ears sticking out of his hair, accompanied by a short, stubby tail poking through his shorts. America laughed nervously. "Dudes, I hardly recognised you? What's going on?"

"Why are you here?" England yelled, pointing an accusing finger at America.

America held out his hands defensively. "Whoa, chill out, dudes. I got this costume along with a letter this morning. There's a picture of me I'd rather not people see, so to get it back, I had to show up dressed like this. Canada as sent the same letter, but he doesn't seem that worried about it."

France pranced away, his long hair bobbing and swaying in the light breeze rusting through the leaves of the surrounding trees.

"I received same creepy letter additionally," said a familiar voice from the tree above them. England and America looked up. It was China. He wore a long red-and-lime-green Mandarin Jacket, with his long hair clipped up with hair clips the shape of small orange flowers. He held a letter in his left hand, and he didn't look happy.

"China?" England and America yelled out in surprised unison.

"Okay, for real, who would pull such a disrespectful stunt?" China demanded. "This is so much embarrassment!" he jumped down from the branch he was perched on. "I do not like it."

"So it's not just me?" Russia asked, poking his head out from underneath a manhole cover, resting a pale arm on the concrete path in front of him. "Oh great, I have greatness relief now."

"Russia! What the hell are you doing in the sewer?" England asked as America laughed obnoxiously.

"Total gross mistake!" China inputted over the booming sound of America's continued laughter.

Russia poked his head back into the manhole. "I'm embarrassed!" The cover of the manhole slammed back into place.

Out of the corner of his eye, England could see France smirking. America noticed as well. France saw them looking and turned, running for his life. America and England ran after him, yelling. "Hey, guys, wait for me!" Russia called after them, crawling out of his hiding spot. He wore a pale orange-and-yellow dress that showed off his chest and arms, frilly lacing decorating the edges. Folded, white cat ears lay nestled in his hair, his usual scarf tied around his neck.

"You looking like you are breaking your own 'Pro-Hate' law!" China remarked, causing Russia's cheeks to become rose-tinted with embarrassment.

England continued chasing France long after America had already given up, yelling things like: "Come back here, you bloody pervert!" and, "I swear, I will curse you into oblivion!"