Alone

What is being alone actually mean ?

When you hear the word loneliness you think automatically think of someone how is very discluded or categorized as a misfit. I personally believe that being alone is not so much as the absence of being around people but being around people that make you feel alone. Some people may not mean to make feel alone but it happens whether we can control or not, I'm here to discuss how people make others feel lonely or a misfit in the crowd .
HOW DO PEOPLE MAKE OTHERS FEEL ALONE???
Take for example when your with your friends hanging but you are always are persuaded to feel that you don't fit in for example if all of your friends always talk about their significant others or they talk about themselves so long you just listen because you don't what to say to help. Another way people make others feel alone is they tell them that "Oh it's a Anime thing you wouldn't get it" or "You wouldn't get it". Another way people are made to feel lonely is being in a group of people but yet none say hardly two words to you or when they do it's a casual question instead someone actually wanting to make new friends. Personally I would much rather have one or true friends then a handful of friends that are fake. Honestly i personally have a few select true friends myself but yet when I'm not around them (after school stuff) quite often I am solemnly by myself not with numbers but socialization. for example when I'm alone all the mean things that has been said about me or towards me. Bullies are constantly making people feel lonely. The common saying is that "They are only doing that because their not happy with there own life" is that really the truth?... or is it all said just to make us feel better about ourselves the sad thing is we will never know unless the situation switches. I have being bullied mostly daily for third grade and eleventh grade and continuing,I'm not saying this for pitty but for the simple purpose to explain how bullying changed me. I used to go this school called S.E.S. and times were mostly good there as far as I can seem to remember, but little did I know that in third grade my whole world would change, when my family moved it was for the better we previously lived in a very beaten down trailer but we always had everything we needed, then we moved and I started going to F.E.S. ... I can still recall the first I arrived in that school, in fact I can even recall the clothes I wore, I wore a princess shirt with light tan brown pants. My first day at my new school F.E.S. Happy at last right? that what one would assume, I know this seems to have nothing to do with the concept but just wait until the end... My first day at F.E.S. ... I got there late because I had to get enrollment paper so the other children in my class were at recess so I nervously set my stuff down and began to head out recess. All of the popular kids started talking to me and I was a very nervous person at the time so I was really awkward then, skip ahead to fourth of fifth grade and ... there was this girl that wanted to make me fit in, for identity protection I will call her Jane, Jane tried to help me fix my wardrobe in fit in but after a very short time she gave up and I never made hardly any friends and then Jane became to make fun of me with the other kids and this other girl with the same name as mine which I will not mention also bullied until tenth grade. One more person that bullied me was "Dale" is what I will call him nothing close to his actual name. ... let's start off with the person with the same name, I let "Maddie"(not her real name) bully me from third grade all to tenth. It go to the point that I had enough of "Maddie" making fun of me telling lies and spreading rumors about that things finally got to be to much to listen to her bully me any longer , so I bet your wondering what I did huh ? What I did was long overdue... I was in Gym class that year at my school that only requires one year of physical education, anyhow I was in gym class one day and we were playing capture the flag and she had always like picked on me because I always guarded this certain base (that's the object of the game, mostly) she and her "friends" decided that they were going to finally set me off edge one day and she try to push a hola hoop at me and me to show to her friends, right after that she was whispering to her friends that she was going to hit me with a plastic wiffle bat and at this pony I couldn't take her bullying me anymore so I said "If you hit me with that damn bat you'll be sorry" and that was pretty much then end because she Broke the hula hoop and blamed it on me but she got in trouble for it. The other person that bullied me "Dale" to make a long story short kept making fun of til eighth grade until I told him off because I couldn't take it anymore, then high school came everything supposed to get less dramatic, wrong ! there is more drama, when I got to high school I thought I would make good friends , that sort of happened but only very few, my junior year I decided I was finally gonna change and not be the outcast and I started dressing different eventually acting different it was, all the changes I made was to not be a misfit, needless to mention it didn't really work as well as I thought it would. But... Today I was invited to in gage in a conversation about one of my close friends and then we started talking about random stuff and for them short minutes I finally felt what it feels like to be a part of socializing and engaging in a real conversation. In the end it's not all the people making you feel alone perception and physiological qualities.
To anyone that maybe be reading this story if you feel like your alone then stay tuned this song is for you. ~TheLoneHeart