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I was six years old when my dad up and left us. No goodbye. No warning. Just up and left. I remember crying for him for weeks. I thought it was my fault for a very long time that he left. I thought he left because I was naughty.

It took a while for me to get over that. Mum was distraught for a while and my brother Eli would keep me company. He was only ten. He fed me when I was hungry, he packed my lunches for school and we would walk to school together.

Eli played with me when I was bored, more than happy to get off his game to do so. For weeks, he would do the washing so we had clean clothes.

It wasn't because my mother didn't do them from heartbreak. Sure, she was hurt and felt lost for a while, but she picked herself back up and carried on. It was because of that, she had to carry on, to support us.

With dad gone, so was an income. So mum had to pick up the slack, work longer hours, get two jobs.

But every now and then, when I was a child, I would hear her cry late at night. It would wake Eli and I up and we both would go to her room, see her on the bed sitting upright and crying.

Eli and I would climb on to the bed and hug her so tight as she would apologise for waking us. Then we would all snuggle together and fall asleep.

As the years went on, I forgot about my father. I forgot what he looked like. All the photos of him had gone. When I ask Eli, he would get irritated, telling me to forget about that drop kick. He wasn't worth it.

Mum grew resentful, but only towards dad so I didn't ask anymore questions. I kept him at the back of my head like mum and Eli would.

We struggled, but mum tried her hardest. She really did. She would let us have a day off school when she wasn't working that day to spend time with us. But as we grew, Eli stayed at school, trying to get good grades but was failing miserably.

I knew he didn't sleep much. He would toss and turn, groan and yell even in his sleep. When he was old enough, he started working to help pay the bills.

When I asked him why did he have to work too, he would look down at me then crouch to my level with a sad smile. "Caity, I'm the man of the house and I have to help mum pay for it. This is a big house, it is expensive to upkeep." Then he would promise to bring me home a treat after his shift.

Then when I was thirteen, Eli just turned seventeen, he had dropped out off school and got a full time job. He worked for hours through the days, then work at night and weekends else where.

I didn't know why he stopped attending school, but I no longer see him there through the day. I may be grade eight, but Eli was a senior and only had six months of school left.

Mum and Eli would talk a lot and whenever I was around, the topic would change. Whatever they spoke about, they didn't want me to know.

But soon enough, I found out why mum's two jobs went to one and Eli worked two jobs. Why Eli had to drop out off school. Why they didn't discuss their hush whispers with me.

Mum was sick. She got worse every week. Her hair started thinning out till there was no hair left and she wore hats and scarves, bandanas and beanies. Mum would be sick in the toilet and she had many tablets to take every morning and night.

I offered to stay at home and look after her but I got told no.

"You need to finish school." Eli would tell me as he hugged into me before messing my light brunette hair.

"You didn't." I would whinge and Eli would shrug.

"I'm older than you." He would tease me with a smirk.

Then the worst fortnight came for us. Mum had to go to hospital and stay there. I would visit every morning before school and every afternoon after school for about a week and a day. Then I stopped going to school.

I didn't want to go to school because I wanted to spend time with my mum. I knew she was getting worse every day. Then on a cold Saturday, Eli next to me as I laid against him on the chairs, our mother took her last breathe.

Ever since then, Eli looked after me. It was just me and him in this world. Eli became my guardian, after fighting with the government about us going into foster care.

Eli did everything for me. He didn't think about himself. He didn't have any girlfriends and if he did, it wasn't a long relationship. It was more of a four hour long relationship.

But by the time I was sixteen, I wasn't dumb. I knew money was as tight as ever. I tried my hardest to get a job for weekends or after school but no where would hire me.

We made our budget stretched as far as possible and we couldn't afford to get things fixed.

One of the toilets were clogged, a sink in another bathroom was busted. The grill in the oven died. The power point the microwave plugs into zaps you. The tap snapped off the wall in my bathroom for the bath.

The gardens were over run and the grass needed mowing. The deck needed to be polished and even the whole house could do with a new coat of paint.

But we couldn't afford to do any of it. We were lucky enough to have enough money to pay bills for the month and have enough food to eat, skipping breakfasts and snacking out.

We couldn't even afford Netflix.

Then one day, workmen appeared and things were getting fixed. Old appliances got replaced. The fridge, freezer and pantry was full again.

Clothes were even getting washed in the nice smelling washing powder. Eli got the wooden floors waxed and the house got its paint job, including the new varnish on the decks.

"Where did all the money come from to get it all fixed?" I asked Eli one night as I stared over my textbook.

"Enjoy it, Caity. I got a new job. One that pays better." Eli boasted proudly as he dished up some take away chinese on my plate.

"Doing what?" I wanted to know but Eli's face changed.

"Don't you worry about that. You don't need to worry about anything any more. I've got you." Then he grinned as he handed me my plate.

I smiled back in return. I love Eli so much. He is the best big brother anyone could ask for.

But as the time passed, I noticed Eli had weird work hours. He would leave at ten at night and come home around seven in the morning. Sometimes not till the next night. He would be knackered and cranky, but he always tried not to take it out on me.

That happened more and more. I noticed it was random, no pattern at all, except that he always got a phone call first.

When I asked him what time does his job start one day, he shrugged nonchalantly and said whenever he gets a phone call.

I thought it to be real weird until he requested something off me one day. It smothered the cake in weirdness.

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