It's not goodbye, it's see you later.

If You Ever Come Back

Welcome to the life of me. My name is Cecelia Dinehart, but people call me Cece or Lia. I'm 19 years old and I'm, well, I'm just me. Nothing special. I mean sure I guess I am special to some people, but to myself? No I don't consider me anything special at all. Anyways moving on, Im a sophmore in college and my major is PT (Physical Therapy). I love college, but I feel alone. Yes I have friends, a lot actually, if that's what your wondering but noone is as close to me like he is or was. I miss him. Who he is. Who we were. How I was when he was near me. I miss being happy. But after he left I became depressed and lonely. I haven't seen him in little over a year. Does he still remember me? Does he know how much I love him? Will I ever get the chance to tell him? All of these questions circulate my head nonstop.

A year and a little ago...

I sit down and take in the view. I don’t know about you but I think that looking out at a lake at sunset is breath taking. Snapping a few pictures of the sunset I see out of the corner of my eye someone sit down next to me. I turn to look into the eyes of the one I fell in love with years ago. I smile and turn my attention back to the lake not even thinking that today would be the day my life turned up side down. Dramatic I know but you dont understand. Sitting there I'm content, until he take's my hand and squeezes it gently. This action makes me look at him and he looks sad, scared, worried all at the same time.

"Whats wrong?" Turning towards him to show him he has my undivided attention.

"Cecelia I need to tell you something."

He never says my full name unless he's serious. Which means i'm going to dread what i'm about to hear.

"Okay I'm all ears."

"I'm being deployed in two weeks." He's says tearing up.

Wait, WHAT!?! Did I hear him correctly? Did he just say deployed? To where? For what?

"Deployed? For what? Your not even in anything." 

"My father regestured me for the Military. I didn't want to tell you because I knew how upset you'd be."

No. This isn't happening. This can't HAPPEN! He can't be leaving me. Not now. Not when we're 2 years aways from graduating college. NO NO NO!

"No."

"Cece I'm so sorry but I have no choice. I can't back out."

"NO! Tell them you can't go. Tell them you quit. Tell them that I said that they are not allowed to have you!!" And with those last words I was crying. I could feel his strong arms around me and his lips on my forehead. 

"Ssshh Cece please stop crying. You now it breaks my heart when I see my bestfriend crying. Look at me please." Lifting my chin he made me look him in his eyes. And right now that's the last thing I wanted to do, because I knew that as soon as I saw them, my heart would break more.

Over the next two weeks we spent every waking moment together. I keep telling myself that it's all just a dream, that I'm gonna wake up from this terrible nightmare and realize that I have nothing to worry about. But slowly I come to terms with the fact that it's not just a dream, and i won't be waking up. My best-friend, since i was a child, is leaving in little over 3 days, and i have to say goodbye. 

Every day that ends is another day closer to that one day. The day my heart will break into millions of small pieces. The day we will say our goodbyes and he will walk away into the unknown world of the life of a soldier.

Present day...

"Cece get your ass up NOW!" Screaming like a mad woman, my roommate burst into my room. Note to self; lock bedroom door from now on.