Overthinking

Chapter 1

I sat on my bed, which was really just a pile of blankets and pillows, with my earbuds in staring at the ceiling. It was slowly falling apart, reminding me of me. I had just moved in a day ago and was already starting to hate this place. 

You see, I'm a foster child that no one wants. I have been in and out of homes since the incident that killed my parents. I was five when they were killed but I still remember every shout of pain, every gunshot still rang through my head as if I were still there. I would wake up in the mornings and my throat would be scratchy from where I had been screaming the night before. 

I'm now 15 and I've been brought back to this same foster home at least 20 times since I first got here, which is a lot more than any of the other people living here. I've reached the age where I'm too old for anyone to foster or adopt, but too young to leave the foster home for good and live by myself, which I wouldn't be able to do anyway. 

I was deep in my thoughts when a face appeared over mine. The face belonged to the owner of the group home, a sweet old lady who is more a mother figure to me. 

"Get up lazy butt, it's time for school," Ms. Grey said as she reached out a hand for me to grab. I gripped her hand before pulling myself up, releasing a grunt as the bones in my body cracked. "Oh dear, you sound older than me," she chuckled. I felt the corners of my mouth lift as I started getting ready. 

"Ms. Grey, that's not possible. You were alive when dinosaurs were still roaming the earth," I joked as she headed towards the door again. 

"Hurry up before you miss the first period," she said in what seemed to be a serious tone, but I saw she was holding back a smile. She exited the room just as I finished putting on my uniform. I turned to leave the room as well but I caught a quick glimpse of my reflection in the mirror. 

I looked at my reflection and thoughts started to fill my head. I felt tears well up in my eyes as the words from people at school started filling my head. 

'Disgusting'

'Worthless' 

'Fat'

'Unwanted'

The tears fell as I looked down at the floor and turned away from the mirror. I walked out the door and headed down the stairs, wiping my tears away. I walked out of the group home and, after making sure the gate was locked, continued my way down the street towards school. 

Once I made it to the steps of the school, I took a deep breath before entering, preparing myself for the looks and stares I would get.  I don't know how but the kids at my school somehow managed to find out about my parents and have been bullying me ever since, saying things like it's my fault that they are dead, or that maybe I should just do the world a favor and join them. 

From what I've been told, my parents were hated by everyone, all because they didn't have the luxury that everyone else in this town had. They thought that they were just faking being poor and were just doing it so they could get free stuff. I never understood how that would work, but the people of this town believed it and made it their mission to make my life a living hell. 

Have I thought about giving in and just removing myself from the world? Yes, multiple times actually, but will I ever do it? I still don't know the answer to that honestly. 

I got to my first class of the day and headed towards my desk. I heard people whispering and I overheard that someone new was joining the class. I sat down at my desk and put my head down, praying for the day to end quickly so I could go back and contemplate life. 

I heard the whispering stop and put my head up to see the teacher standing in the front of the class, and a girl standing by her side. I was spacing out and looking out the window when I felt someone sit in the chair next to me. I turned my head and saw the girl that was standing up front in the seat. She looked at me and smiled before turning her attention back to the teacher

'She's pretty,' I thought as I turned my head towards the window again, 'too bad she'll probably end up hating me by the end of the day.' 

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Hello and welcome to the first chapter!!

I wanted to add more but decided that this would be a good place to end for now. 

I'm really excited about this story and have a lot of ideas for it so I hope you like it too!

Peace!!