Find your Voice

Chapter 1: Scott

**This whole story will be from Scott's POV**

Chapter 1: Scott

I sat up in bed with a start as I heard a loud crashing sound. Then came the moaning and laughing. Great. That would be my mother and her new boytoy James. They were into agressive sex and they didn't care who heard them. I was stuck listening to it almost every night but I didn't dare say a word about it. I made that mistake once and got the shit kicked out of me by them both, then spent the night locked in the coat closet. I got chills thinking about it. My mom used to lock me in there when I was little for punishment and one time she left me in there for an entire day and night. I reached for the drawer on my nightstand and opened it very silently. If they heard any noise from my room they'd be pissed that I was awake so I needed to be as quiet as possible. I reached in and grabbed my headphones and plugged them into my phone. I slowly got out of bed and tip-toed to my door. I carefully turned the lock on the doorknob and the tried to open it making sure it was secured. I didn't want to risk them getting bored and coming in here for something to do. I hated when they did that. I got back in bed and put the headphones in my ears turning up the volume to drown out the horrid sound of them getting it on. It was disgusting and it gave me pictures in my head that I didn't want to see. I glanced at the clock, 4am. Awesome...I had to be up in three hours for school. I'm glad they're so considerate. My mom hated me and she made it clear all the time that I had ruined her life. She was barely sixteen when she had me and she didn't even finish highschool because of me. After I told her I was gay she became more and more abusive, and when she wasn't using me as a punching bag she would completely ignore my presence. James however loved to talk to me, or rather insult me every chance he got. Their favorite thing to do was to gang up on me and try to see who could leave the bigger and darker bruise, never where people could see of course. I rolled over on my side and closed my eyes trying to fall back asleep. Then I heard it. The door handle jiggling rapidly. I sat up and took out my headphones, watching the doorknob turn. "God damnit it's locked!" James cursed and then pounded the door. "Scott! You better open this fucking door now!" My mother screamed and I pulled my knees to my chest. They were both drunk, I could tell and there was no fucking way I was moving from this spot. The yelling and pounding continued for almost an hour before they finally gave up, or passed out. Either way it was finally silent. I squeezed my eyes shut and felt the tears roll down my cheeks. This was stupid! I was fifteen years old and I was crying myself to sleep. I should be tougher, I shouldn't be so scared. I should be able to defend myself I mean after all I was over six feet tall! But I wasn't tough, and I couldn't defend myself. I was a coward, and I let them do things to me. I just wanted a normal life like the kids in my school. No one knew what my home life was like and no one cared to want to know. I had no friends and I was too shy to attempt to even make any. I barely spoke unless I was spoken to by a teacher, and other kids rarely spoke to me unless it was to hurl insults at me. I think my favorite thing they did was shove me into lockers. (sarcasm) I lived in a very small town in texas and as far as I knew I was the only gay person in the whole school, or at least the only openly gay boy. People didn't like that fact about me too much, teachers included. It felt like the whole world was against me. I was completely alone. I had two years left in this place before I could finally leave and move somewhere else where no one knew me. Start over and become a different person. Picturing this was the only thing that kept me going honestly. Finally I was able to fall asleep for a few hours.

The alarm on my phone blared and I opened my eyes slowly and rubbed them. I turned off the alarm and stayed in bed for a moment looking up at the ceiling. Sighing loudly I got up and walked to my door. I put my ear to the wood listening for any movement from my mother and James. Nothing. I unlocked the door and cautiously pushed it open only to find that they had passed out right in front of my doorway and I couldn't get the door open enough to get through. Whoever designed this stupid house was an idiot! I mean who makes it so the door opens towards the hallway? Most doors open into the room right? I closed the door and grumbled under my breath. I guess I'll have to use the window. No shower for me today...great. I got dressed and grabbed my backpack making sure everything was in there that I needed before opening my window and taking out the screen. I've gotten pretty good at taking out the screen since I've been locked out of the house mutliple times. I climbed out the window and grabbed the screen securing it back to the window. I then made my way to school, my favorite place in the world. (sarcasm again...) I did like school more than home though. People at school may hate me but they didn't beat me up nearly as bad as James and my mom so that was a plus. I just hoped this day would go smoothly because after last night I was too tired to deal with any shit today.