Unwanted. Unloved.
You lay on the couch with her all cuddled up and asleep. When I was right fucking beside you on the love seat. Why couldn't you have held me? Why couldn't you have slept with me? Why couldn't you make me feel loved? Why couldn't I have helped with your project? I fucking love you and you're hurting me. You're supposed to be my daddy. Take care of me and protect me and love me and make me happy. But you're always choosing her and her side and always sitting by her and always fucking laughing and smiling with her. Do you even want or need me anymore ? Because you're acting like I don't mean fucking shit to you. Please start loving me. Or just tell me honestly what you want from/with me. Because making me feel worthless and unworthy of love fucking sucks. Please stop! I want you. You're my daddy. MINE. Not hers. You even told me to my face you didnt see her as a relationship type. That you guys are just friends. So like wtf.
Yet you're asleep with her on the couch right now!?!?!??!?!?!?
Why cant you be in our bed, with your arms around me?
Why is she in your arms right now on the fucking couch?
Do you even want this with me?
Dont force this just because its what I want.
Do it for what you want. What makes you happy...
If you want her....then just tell me.
Because you make me feel worthless when shes around.... You have one on one conversations with her when I'm there. And when I try to say something, its either wrong or you make a joke out of it.
And you wonder why the fuck I always have a fucking attitude.
Like I do so much for you..... Keep your house clean. Help with bills. Make sure you're fed. Make sure you have drinks and snacks. Make sure you shower and brush your teeth. Do your laundry. Back rubs whenever you ask. Do anything you tell me to. I drive 20 minutes everyday to bring you lunch at work. EVERYDAY. I do so much for you.
So if you dont want this, please let me know now, before I get any more pain from this 'relationship'.
I'm supposed to be number one. Your top priority. Your lover. Your baby girl. Your ride or die. YOURS. NOT HERS.
If she's only your friend, then why does she get treated better than me? She gets all the conversations, all the fun things you make or do, all the inside jokes, all the things that I'm supposed to have.
It's like I'm here for your sexual and maid needs.
That's how you make me fucking feel and it sucks.
Shes always complaining how she feels the way I do. But she doesn't understand she always gets the conversations. The couch cuddles. The projects. The fun times. The fixing shit fun. The everything I fucking want.
Am I jealous? Ya damn skippy.
I'm your GIRLFRIEND. Not your friend. So either treat me like it, or I'm fucking out. I'm done trying so hard. And always getting told I'm dumb or I'm wrong or I'm 'funny'.
You say I always break your heart because I "treat you like shit". Yet you're the one cuddled up with our friend. You aren't even in the bed with me, YOUR GIRLFRIEND.
PLEASE HELP.
BAD DAYS ARE COMING. THEY ARE VERY CLOSE
And I'm sorry I'm not very knowledgeable on life like yall. I had to raise my fucking self. So I'm sorry if I don't know all that stupid car shit. Or gun shit. Or music shit. Or sports shit. Or engineering shit.
IM SORRY
SORRY IM NOT FUCKING GOOD ENOUGH FOR YOU. BUT GUESS WHAT
I FUCKING LOVE YOU AND IDK WHY I DO BECAUSE YOURE CONSTANTLY HURTING ME.
PLEASE HELP ME. SOMEONE. IM ABOUT TO FUCKING EXPLODE.
Rayne hasn't been out in a while. And I miss her. Fuck playing nice. You fucking whore cheater. FUCK YOU!!
