Distortion

Put the knife down

Hey. My name is Luna.I should tell you a couple of things before anything.
 
  
     For starters,I am a 16 year old girl , red hair,brown eyes, fair skin. My parents divorced when i was 3 years old. Even with that, we still went on trips all over the world, with them feeling the need to deny the inevitable nonexistent family love that i recieved as a child. As a result, they were always fighting with me helplessly watching in the same room and crying under the bed.

        I still remember it like it was yesterday.
 

My dad is an alcoholic and sometimes aggresive, also extremely religious to the point of ridiculousness.

!!Not trying to say that belief is ridiculous at all, but his train of thinking is way off and extremely far to what people would consider being religious.

    My mom got the custody of me and my sister, born 10 years after me ,because my dad is an alcoholic psychopath.
He didn t even come to court, he just paid people to lie about him being clean. Even with all of this, mom let him take me once or twice a month to stay at his.

When i was a child , after my mom had custody of me ,he would tell me that not even God could ever tear us apart and that my mother was a demon that i had to stay away from.

I am happy i matured so fast because even as a child, i never considered his words as true. He wanted me to go to court with him and say that i want to live with him and not my mom because she is abusive and he basically tried to brainwash me to do so.
He didn t succeed because my mother is the purest soul i have ever met and i loved her too much.

That poor woman suffered so much i can t even imagine. My dad had a lot of money and me and my mother live on a low budget at the moment. Now, he is trying to do the same for my sister and he told my mother that he would buy lawyers and take her children. I d rather die than live with my dad.

 We lived in the same house for 13 years, moving in and out. My mom gave him lots of chances but he was not willing to change for family. Now he is trying to lure me and my sister with money just to ruin moms life. He only wants her to never be happy. He doesn t even truly want us.
He recently got a new girlfriend that behaves EXACTLY like my mom and she is a sweetheart. I don t dare tell her anything though.

To the point: I had a dream where i was in the house with my dad and his gf (his house) and he was in the bathroom, cleaning a big knife. I remember feeling like something bad was going to happen and i looked at him. Then i went in the biggest room in the house, where his gf was standing on the bed, and i saw a knife on the counter , near her head. To my surprise, she didn t notice it at all. I put a small pair of scrissors under the bed and warned her about the bad feeling i had. She only said "at least my children are not here, it s fine."
I suddenly felt helpless. I ran into the kitchen but my dad caught me in the way. I looked him in the eyes and froze. He calmly said " Don t even bother trying to run, i will slice her head off and when i am done, i am going to slice you into pieces and even if you think you escaped, be sure you will never ever be safe" It was so explicit i literally felt like i wanted to puke in real life.

 At this point, i kind of half-realised it was a dream because my heart was beating too fast in real life and it phisically hurt me. I was also definitely crying.
As it turned into kind of a lucid dream, me knowing i was sleeping but still not able to change the narrative of the story,i tried to jump from the window when i remembered about me having to save his gf so because i didn t run he threw a big knife at me and hit me.

     I woke up mortified,crying and sweating profusely. I almost had a panic attack because it felt so real. It felt like it actually could happen. I actually see this happening. At this point, i m truly scared of my father. The problem is that he is trying to fix his mistakes and fix his relationship with me and drives me to school sometimes. He will drive me to school tomorrow.

        I have a bad feeling about it.