Not just a father, but a best friend

The beginning

What is this feeling that I feel?

What is happening?

Why me? Why me?

I remember sitting in the doctors office when I was 3. I was with my mum, dad and 2 sisters. We were there cause my dad kept having memory loss problems. I remember seeing my dad having these tests done and seeing the fear in his eyes. When the doctor came back my mum was scared and my dad was terrified of what the outcome could be.

Tears rolling down her face I knew that the test's didn't come back positive. I remember 1 thing the doctor said " I am so sorry that this has happened."

I don't know what I was feeling cause I didn't understand at the time that my father had dementia. I realised that my own father would not ever see me or my sisters grow up and become whatever we become. But more importantly he would not remember........

Remember his wife, his family and more importantly his 3 daughters.

I feel pain, I feel hurt, I feel lost. I mean who is a girl without her father. It is not right that I have grown up like this.