September 21, 2011...
That is the day i had to choose between 2 guys who said they loved me...
This is day i almost took my own life.
One of them was good for me, would do anything to make me happy.
The other was toxic, yet made my heart beat unsteadily for hours after hanging up the phone.
To this day i still remember imagining two doors, One white, one black.
I chose the black one.
Blindly, i followed him into a black room, with a flickering light...
September 21 2012
One year later...
I will always remember my choice as the one thing i did right in my life.
He is my everything...
and it scares me...
It scares me to know that if he ever went away...
i dont know if i would survive.
Not because of love...
Even though i love him with everything that is me.
Im scared because without this amazing man,
I am a just a body,
without a soul,
without a care to what is wrong, or right.
He is my knight in shining armor,
Keeping me safe from the Monster inside myself.
He is my teddy bear,
Keeping me safe from my nightmares.
He is my true love,
i love him, i hate him, i need him.
I think it would make him happy to know,
that for the first time in 6 long years,
There is a true smile on my face,
because of him.
Thank you Jonathan,
For making my life worth living again.
Happy Year anniversary<3
