My alarm went off abruptly, my eyes shooting open, stunned by the loud and unfamiliar sound. I turned over, suddenly aware I was not in my soft memory foam bed, and I wasn't surrounded by the warm, pink aura of my big bedroom. These walls were a dirty white, and as I looked around more, I realized I was engulfed by a room of disorganization and filth.
I slowly walked over to the dust-covered mirror to find that my features have changed. My nose was smaller, my eyes a dark, sad-looking blue; my lips were as thin as paper and my shoulder length hair a deep brown. I felt the lumps of my ribs through my shirt, prominent under the pads of my fingers, and my ashen, snow white complexion a big difference of my usual features--I was a walking skeleton.
I crept downstairs to find a lady, who I presume to be her mother, on the phone. I didn't get a "good morning," a hug, or even breakfast, before she slammed the front door on her way out. I opened the fridge to find it empty. Eventually, after scouring the kitchen, I managed to find a slice a bread to eat before having to leave and navigate my way to school. By last period the only thing that cracked a smile on my face was the dismissal bell at 2:15. I sprinted, wanting to escape her secret war zone known as the halls as fast as I possibly could. On my way, I passed my own usual group of friends, a glance in my direction was a wish that would never come true, an eye locking with mine was unimaginable, and wanting one of them to say at least a word to me was absolutely insane.
When I reentered the house, I was preparing myself for a 5 course meal. Instead I was welcomed with a mass of screaming and fighting between these two parents. I spent the rest of my night plugging my ears on my rock hard bed, attempting to tune out the misery suffocating me.
This poor girl, she was the girl no one cared to notice. She was just some random everyone on the outside thought had weight problems and social anxiety. No one knew she just didn't have enough money to fill her skin and give her red, plumped cheeks. She wasn't antisocial--she was caged in a battlefield, incapable of even faking a smile.
I returned the next morning on my big queen sized bed. I didn't feel like eating breakfast, so I kept it. At the back table on the left side of the cafeteria, where I knew she would sit, I placed my saved breakfast and lunch on the dirty cafeteria table. For the first time, I noticed the way she dragged her body through the smiling faces of friends reuniting after a two hour separation, something I couldn't have noticed unless witnessing it on the outside. She eventually plopped down in her seat to find the bag I left her.
Not until then had I noticed the beauty her blue eyes held when she smiled.
-Alex
