East West Sunset - A Darry Curtis Fanfiction

Chapter Twenty-Nine

I didn't know where I was going to go. I ran blindly from the Curtis house, my chest searing with what felt like a whiplash and my head buzzingly numb. It was a confusing pair of opposites, with feeling below and numbness above. I felt tired. It seemed like I was staring down at myself through a narrow tube, and the majority of my vision was black with uncertainty. I ran past Darry's old car in the driveway and down the street towards the DX. I wanted to get something to drink and check when the next bus was leaving Tulsa; I needed to get out of here. Pony had destroyed me and Darry's relationship in one hasty sentence spoken in a moment of anger. I was sure there was no way he could ever look at me the same again, since Pony implied the fragile thing we had was only a fake.

My chest seized up, and I stumbled off the curb, trying to catch my breath. I hated running from this. I hated running from my problems. Only yesterday I had run away from my past, and now I was running away from my failed future, so here I was again. Running away.

I ran past the garage, whose door was just being opened with a metallic shriek, and burst into the DX. The bell fairly flew from its post above the door as I flung it open, and Steve looked up at me with an alarmed expression. I grabbed a root beer from the cooler next to the register and placed it on the counter.

"Just this," I said, my voice thick with unshed tears. 

"Are you okay?" Steve spoke to me as if he was afraid I'd shatter at any second.

"I'm fine," I said, though my trembly voice wasn't too convincing. "Do you have a copy of the bus schedule?"

Steve looked stricken. "You aren't leaving Tulsa already? Why? Did something happen?"

"I am leaving. I got what I came for." I couldn't look him in the eyes as I thought about Darry, my empty heart throbbing.

"Do you want to talk about it?" Steve asked me gently, ringing up my purchase and paying for it out of his own pocket.

This almost made me break down; my knees suddenly gave out, and I slumped against the counter. "It's gonna be okay," I tried to tell him, more for my own benefit than his.

"No. Sit," Steve ordered. He offered me a stool which I sank into gratefully.

"Thanks for buying my pop," I said feebly.

Steve ignored my thanks with a wave of his hand. "What's going on? You're obviously upset about something, and you should tell me what it is."

"Ah, I see. The pop was your attempt as a bribe," I tried for a weak joke, but my heart wasn't in it. Steve just cocked his eyebrow at me.

I sighed and took a long drink from the root beer. "Ponyboy," I growled.

"What?"

"Ponyboy accused me of faking my feelings for Darry."

"What?!" he said again, shaking his head. "That's not like Pony."

"I don't know what is or what is not like Pony. I've only known him for a month." I traced the label on the pop bottle and sighed again. "I've only known all of you for a month. If I'm honest, how do I even know if I really am in love with Darry? How do I know that it isn't just fake after all?" The fear that had been rising in me steadily since Pony made his accusation was bubbling to the surface, and I couldn't stop it once it overtook me. I buried my head in my arms on the counter.

"Diana... it doesn't matter how long you knew him. Sometimes love takes years, sometimes it takes just hours. Sometimes it takes a single moment when you see a girl walking outside while you're out taking a smoke."

I looked up at him to see him giving me a sad smile. 

"The only one who can know your heart is you. You may be mistaken sometimes, but then again, you may not. You shouldn't give up on someone if you still have a shot."