Confusing What Is Real (Andy Biersack/Ashley Purdy one shot)

Hi guys! :) This is the first story I've posted on here, so some feedback would be very nice. 

I do not own the characters in this story, and the story contains lyric references from the song "Crawling" by Linkin Park so the credit for those references goes to the band.

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Andy's POV:

I walked along the path in darkness, thinking. Why did I have to love him? My band mate, my best friend, someone who thought as me as a brother. I sighed, letting the tears fall. I soon realized I should head back to our tour bus as it was getting late and turned around, walking back the way I came.

When I reached the tour bus I was still having tears roll silently down my cheeks. Not as intensely as before, but sobs were still escaping my lips. As I closed the door behind me, I found a pair of eyes staring at me. Of course they were his.

Worst part about me loving him? He used to be my boyfriend years ago, from before we were even in this band together. After a year of being in a band together we agreed that life on tour and in the studio would be much easier if we broke up on friendly terms then than risking to break up as enemies later, because that would have made it almost impossible for the band to go on.

However, I regretted it so much. I loved him more than ever, and even if this band meant so much to me it would never be able to make me fully happy without having the bass player of the band by my side. Sadly, he seemed to have moved on. He was even seen as the man whore as the band which hurt so badly.

I ignored him and went straight to my bunk, crying myself to sleep. Lately I had been having dreams where we were back together or flashbacks from before we broke up. I sometimes woke up happy, thinking we were back together and almost got to the point of kissing his lips before I realized we belonged to the past. I was starting to confuse what was real and what not and it was stressing me out.

I jolted awake in the middle of the night, or at least it felt like it. This time I had a nightmare where I kissed him in the present time and he got really angry with me, refusing to communicate with me for days before forgiving me under the condition that it would never happen again.

Things were getting more and more awkward between me and our bassist, Ash, because of my dreams.  I had a huge fear of messing things up even more by actually confusing things up totally and kissing him. I felt so insecure around him, over-thinking everything about how to act around him because of these dreams and flashbacks I had been having every night for the last months. I had felt this way before, but not since the first few weeks after our break up.

All of these dreams had brought back all my love for him, much of it I had forgotten but now I loved him more than ever. Many people said that after we broke up, I had changed. I knew I could never find myself again without him by my side, I was trying to become the old me again, but with all the pain these dreams were bringing with them it felt harder and harder, like the walls were closing in on me.

The pressure I felt was extreme, the dreams kept haunting me and I knew I was close to breaking down. I would not be able to handle this for much longer. I needed to tell him how I felt and cross my fingers that he would not hate me, or tell the band I needed a break when the tour ended. I felt like being around him so much and not being able to call him mine was pulling me beneath the surface and ruining me inside out.

I stood up from my bed and went to the bath room, seeing it was almost time to get up anyway. I stood unwillingly beside my own reflection in the mirror. I looked so worn out both mentally and physically. I spent minutes washing all the dry tears from my face before I took a shower and got dressed properly.