The Fiction We Live

This is Annalise's story.

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I sit at the back of the classroom, never raise my hand, socialize with no one that I don't know; only talk to my friends and the teachers-this is me on the outside, because no one takes the time to get to know me on the inside...On the inside I'm a normal person, but no one cares. I listen to music for comfort (it seems to be the only thing that gets me), I like guys, I gossips (with the few friends I have), and even play sports.

But middle school has been hard on me; I'm bullied constantly. It's my 8th grade year and everything just keeps going downhill. I'm called HORRIBLE names and my grades are dropping because I'm getting less and less sleep and I don't know why...What's wrong with me? I'm not fat at all, but people call me that. I don't consider myself to be ugly either-I'm skinny, curvy, well developed, and honestly I just want...I just want it to end-not my life, just...everything at the moment, at least.

Anyway, lately this guy I like keeps staring at me...is it my hair? Does he like it? Is it too brown? Too straight? I mean my hair is really straight. Is it my eyes? Does he like blue? Maybe they're too dark, because they're really dark. I hate worrying about my appearance-it's so time consuming and if a guy likes me then I shouldn't have to dress up-if he can't stand me in sweats, then there's just no point in liking him-not that I'm ever going to get a guy. Well, whatever, I mean I can survive sitting next to him in four of my eight classes, right? It's the beginning of the year and I'm dying of nervousness...

(That was first period, second day of school, now it's my fifth week at Landry Middle School) I'm heading to my fifth period, the next class I have with him: science. We still have the same seats in all of our classes, so when the teacher says, "Turn to your shoulder partner and be prepared to work with them for the next month on our first big project of the year-and no trading partners." I freaked out inside. He-Andrew, or Andy as his friends call him, turned to me and said hi...I just couldn't believe the corner back of the Canley County 8th grade middle school Wasps is talking to me. I mumble something unintelligent and pictured him smiling at me-if only. The teacher starts talking about our project-how we were studying astronomy for the next four weeks and we're to research a galaxy and the planets in the galaxy, and even said we would have to exchange numbers because we wouldn't have time in class to finish it and would probably have to do most of the work outside of school. We walked out the door together, making small talk on the project; me refusing to meet his eyes. I then rushed to the next class and was relieved when the bell rang later that day, signifying school was out after having the last two periods with Andrew.

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The next day, a girl named Nikki Diaz-my main tormentor-walked up to me and my best friend, Jennifer, saying, "Oh, Anny! Guess what?" Mimicking Jennifer from two minutes ago, when she excitedly told me that she won twenty-three dollars on a scratch-off yesterday night. Nikki circled me and then hit the books out of my hands, saying, "Are you gonna do something about it?" Then pushed me to the ground and laughed- I got up, grabbed my books, and walked to my third period class.

When I got to fifth period the first words I hear Andrew say are, "You should have stood up for yourself..."

He sort of mumbled it while writing down today's homework, but I knew it was directed to me, so I responded, "It's better to ignore her, if you try to stand up to her it will just get worse...you wouldn't understand..."

He answered, "How do you know, when you don't even try? Maybe she'll go away."

I then claimed, "You know what? This is none of your business..."