The Almighty Choice: A Charmed Fanfiction

Chapter 1: New Shadow

CHIRS' POV

Chris Halliwell flipped through the Book of Shadows angrily, writing down notes on the pad of paper by his side. There has to be something else here! He thought. It had been one month since Leah had died and everyday since he had spent looking for ways to bring her back.

"Damnit!" He yelled and slammed the book shut once more. Angry tears sprung to his eyes and he frustratedly ran his hands through his hair. He stalked over to the spells pot that was sitting on the table. He began to throw herbs into it and began to chant " Power of the witches rise. Course unseen across the skies. Come to us who call you near. Come to us and settle here." Nothing happened and he growled in frustration. He didnt bother trying to call blood to blood, for he knew that it wouldnt work to call Leah back.

He closed his eyes and rubbed his temples, deciding to try a different spell. He grabbed five white pillar candles and arranged them in a circle on the floor, lighting them carefully. He took a deep breath and then began to recite the spell "Hear these words, hear my cry. Spirit from the other side. Come to me, I summon thee, Cross now the Great Divide." When nothing happened again, Chris cursed and threw the pad of paper across the room, almost hitting his aunt Phoebe who had been walking in. "Chris!" Phoebe said as she saw him angrily flop down onto a chair. "What is going on?" She asked.

He looked up at her with tears in his eyes and she came over to him, kneeling down beside him. "Chris, you need to take a break from trying to bring her back." She said softly. He shook his head "Its not that simple Aunt Phoebe." She looked at him with her brows furrowed and he continued. "I cant stop thinking about her, dreaming about her. I see her everywhere, Phoebe. And the worst part is that I know that she died for me and Wyatt and it wasnt her job to do that. Phoebe, I feel guilty. And Ill never be able to tell her how sorry I am and how it should have been me to go and-"

"Chris, stop. Look, we all know that you miss her. We miss her too. But you and I both know that you cant bring back the dead. Otherwise we would have brought back Prue and Mom and Grams by now."

"But Phoebe you dont understand! I cant cope with this! I need to see her, I need something!" Phoebe sighed and stood up. She placed her hand on Chris' shoulder and he looked up at her. "Chris, you need to focus on something other than trying to achieve the impossible. I know its hard but you have to try." Chris stared blankly at his aunt, not breaking their gaze until she finally sighed. "Alright. Im gonna go. Just try and get some rest, ok? Leah wouldnt want to see you like this."

Chris nodded idily and waited for Phoebe to leave the attic before putting his head in his hands.

Leah...he thought.

* * *

My eyes shot open as my dream woke me up. I sat up in my bed and sighed, staring blankly at the wall. Chris...I thought sadly. I rubbed my eyes and swung my feet off of the bed and onto the floor. For the last month I had been living (well sort of living) here in Rapture. I guess the best way to describe it was like heaven, but heaven for the supernatural on the side of good. I guess I should have been glad that I was good enough to make it up here but things werent as serene as Id thought theyd be.

When I first got here I met Prue Halliwell, Piper, Phoebe and Paige's sister. She had taken over the acting role of my guardian, showing me things up here and teaching me. She introduced me to Patty her and the girls' mother and Penny their grandmother (though she prefferred Grams). As well as her husband Andy Trudeau. Though he had not been supernatural when he was alive the Elders thought it was fitting for him to be reuntied with Prue after sacraficing himself for her.

Life (or afterlife) up here wasnt so bad, except for the rules. The three rules that us Shadows had to live by. Number One: for New Shadows such as myself there was absolutely no contact to the human world until the Elders gave us permissiom. Number Two: any of our powers that we had cultivated on earth were kept under lock and key and must be signed out for temporary usage. And Number Three: Any Shadow caught misbehaving were to be exiled to the ghostly plane.

This left me very little options for stuff to do. I had never in my 500 years been without my powers and adjusting to life without them was hard. I missed my demonic half, without it I felt lonely, incomplete. I sighed and wiggled my toes, shaking my head as my dream replayed over in my mind.

The worst part about being up in Rapture though, was not being able to see my family. I missed them so much, and because we werent allowed contact, I wasnt allowed to watch them either. Not until the Elders thought it was fitting. I sighed and tucked some hair behind my ear. Try not to think about him I commanded myself as images of beautiful, green eyes flashed through my mind.

I closed my eyes, squeezing them shut. For the past month those green eyes had plagued my dreams, causing me a very unsettled afterlife experience. I missed Chris. My Chris...I thought as a sharp stab of pain sprung into my chest. I gasped and held my hand over my chest as my emotions started to seep through the careful wall I had surrounded them in.

Yet another thing I hated about being dead. Without my powers, my demonic strength and lack of emotions were gone, causing me to be in the most tremendous amount of pain. When I was still alive, it was easy for me to summon my demonic side and lock down my human emotions. It was as easy as breathing. But now, I didnt know how to deal with this emotional overflow and I was constantly put into uncomfortable situations where I would suddenly start crying or fly into fits of rage.

It was all very new to me. Very new and very hard and I didnt like it one bit.

"Knock knock." Said a voice. I looked up to see my door being opened as Prue came in. "Good morning." She said. I nodded and said in a dull voice "morning." She scruntched her eyes up together and sat down next to me on my bed. "Whats wrong?" She asked. I looked over at her and sighed, leaning forward on my knees "I had another dream." I said. She nodded and said "oh."

Prue knew how I felt, more so than anybody else. But for her it was easier to be up here. Even though she missed her sisters down there, she had her mother and grandmother and husband up here. She had found happiness.

And I envied that.

"Prue, it hurts. I hurt. So much." I said, chocking on my tears. She wrapped her arm around my shoulders and held me tight. "I cant stop thinking about him. Every night I see him, every day I feel him with me and it-it just makes moving on so much harder." I trailed off into a whisper and she sighed.

"I know, I know. I went through the same thing too-"

"But its different for you. You came here welcomed by family, your love. I came here having to make a fresh start. Having to start over."

"That dosnt mean it wasnt just as hard. When I got here I was confused and hurting. And even though I had Mom and Grams and Andy it just seemed like they made everything harder for me." She sighed and stood up. "I just feel so, so...empty." I looked up at her as she placed her hands on her jean clad hips. "Alright, lets go." She said. I raised my eyebrows at her. "Go where?" I asked.

"Theres something I need to show you."