Mistake And Guilt

I am sorry

It had been quite some time to the ' Koffee with Karan ' incident but Hardik was still not over it and how could he when his teammates had not forgiven him .
He really was guilty for his actions but could not convey it properly.
Day by day he started feeling left out.
To be precise it wasn't the fault of his teammates because they did not expect it from him . They just wanted him to know that he didn't do the right thing.
But to Hardik it felt like his brothers will never forgive him .
His captain Virat was not even sparing him a glance . Kuldeep and Yuzi whom he used to boss around gave him little smiles but it was never the same . His Mahi Bhai was not talking to him since that day . Rohit Bhai who always used to tease him was behaving as if he did not exist .
But what he didn't know was it was hurting his brothers a lot more than it was hurting him . They could not help but feel sad . Why would they not when their brother who was an immature kid behind all the gold chains and  arrogant looks had lost his smile .
Mahi's pov
Why did that idiot have to do that . He feels so helpless . I want to go and punch him , hug him  , slap him , scold him and tell him that it's gonna be okay
God Mahi get a grip over yourself. We are doing this for his good.
" No matter how much you tell this to yourself we both know you want to forgive him " My ' Ever so supportive' conscience  smirked . I gave him a disgusted look and his smirk grew. Wow ! Just wow ! Here I am trying so hard to be mad at him and my dear conscience is making it sooooo difficult.
I was brought out of my trance by Cheeku. He said' Mahi Bhai you are being called for dinner ' I could understand from his voice that he too was worried about Hardik.
So I asked 'Why just me ? You won't be joining or what? ' To which he replied ' I am not hungry Bhai you go.'
I rolled my eyes at his statement . Does he think I am going to buy that excuse. Like really? He gave me a confused expression. I said,' You know not eating the food will not help you in any way , will it Cheeks ? ' He couldn't think of a response so he just stood there . I took him by his arm and started dragging him towards the elevator.
As the elevator door was about to close a person stopped it with his hand and came inside . I was shocked to react in any way . Hardik , Cheeku and myself together in an elevator was the last thing I wanted right now . Hardik tried to force a smile on his face but I felt as if my lips were sealed and I didn't smile back . Cheeku just took out his phone and got busy into that as if nothing happened. But I knew better . He was trying to act strong and show Harr... uh Hardik as if he was  unaffected but I could feel that the big brother in him wanted to comfort Hardik.
With great courage I took a look at Hardik and it felt as if he had been shattered. He also took out his phone and blinked furiously to stop the tears from flowing down. God this elevator was taking more time than the Mumbai-Ranchi flight to reach down.
Finally we reached the ground floor and joined our teammates. Hardik tried making conversation with everyone but nobody spoke more than a few words . I wanted to scold everyone for doing that to Hardik.
' Seriously? Have you by any chance forgotten that you are doing the same thing ' my conscience gave me an irritated look. I just ignored him because honestly he was correct .
Hardik just sat down and played with his food the whole time. Well I was no better than him.
' Ya ya if murdering the salad with your fork means playing with it ' my conscience spoke again. I glared at him and looked down only to see that I had actually cut it  into several pieces that too with a FORK . HOW IS IT EVEN POSSIBLE? I was never really a violent person.
I was again brought out of my thoughts by Cheeku who said that ' Really Bhai? You were the one who dragged me down here to have dinner and you are ... I don't know what in the world are you doing ' I just shrugged and started eating my food.

The whole dinner went by like that and we all came back to our rooms . Thankfully this time Hardik did not accompany us in the elevator otherwise it would have been awkward.

Hardik's pov
Why is this happening with me ? I can't bear all my brothers giving me a cold shoulder . Mahi Bhai and Virat Bhai ignored me even in the lift. Nobody talked to me on the dinner table . I did not eat anything . I was just fiddling with my food. I really don't know what to do now. I took the stairs while returning back to my room because I knew that if I see one more person ignoring me then I will break down . I just hurried into my room and slumped against the wall. I didn't even bother to close the door. I started shivering and crying . I knew that I was going to have a panic attack. Yes ! I used to get panic attacks earlier. The last one was about 3 years back. What will I do now? ....