All I've ever wanted since I was ten years old was to feel safe and secure. Instead, I've spent the last seven years of my life hiding in plain sight from a man that was supposed to love me unconditionally. Now that I've settled into a routine, I re...
I shot straight up in bed, gasping for air- another nightmare. I've been having them since the day I left my father all those years ago. They are few and far between but they leave me exhausted for the entire day.
I sit for a few minutes trying to wake up and shake off the fear. Once I have myself back under control, I roll off the side of the bed and hop across the cold wooden floor to the bathroom. When I'm done doing my business, I head out towards the small living room in search of Gil.
"Gilbert! Where are you hiding?" Calling him with no luck, I make my way to the kitchen to get his treats. I shake the small yellow bag and he comes running, knocking over a few of the cardboard boxes scattered across the room. I just moved to Denver from Chicago about three weeks ago. After I finished my bachelor in human resources at the University of Chicago, I struggled to find a job. I didn't know where to look and I was also burdened by fear. I knew my father was looking for me, I could feel it. That's why I refuse to stay in one place for more than a few years and since I couldn't find work in Chicago anyway, I moved.
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Gil rubbed up against my legs a few times and looked at me expectantly. I bent down to give him a few chin scratches before I put a treat down in front of him. Once I fed him, I went about getting ready for my day. My exhaustion was apparent but I had a few errands I needed to run today. I dressed in a simple black hoodie and leggings, pulling my long hair up into a messy bun. I didn't bother with any makeup and put on my black nike slides, and headed for the door. Once the door was locked behind me I turned towards the stairs. I only lived on the second floor of my apartment building and It was pointless to take the elevator. Before I could make it to the door that led to the stairs, a short balding man stepped out in front of me from his apartment across the hall. I've met him only once before. His name was Jim and to be honest he was the creepiest guy I've ever met. He was always looking at me in a way that made me uncomfortable. Like he wanted to cut me up into pieces and shove me in his freezer type of looks.
"Oh. Hey, Jim." I gave a tight smile and tried to move around him, only to be stopped again when he moved back in front of me. "Excuse me."
"Wait just one minute. I wanted to talk to you." He gave a grimy smile, filled with yellow teeth and bad breath. "I wanted to see if you were busy tonight. You could come over to my apartment and I'll cook you something. What do you say?" I suddenly felt a little bad for the guy. He was a little creepy but that didn't mean I had to be rude.
"I'm sorry, Jim. I just don't think I can." I gave another tight smile and pushed around him. The weird thing was, when I looked back, he was still smiling that same grimy smile.
***
I stepped into Starbucks and removed the soaked hood from my head. It started pouring rain as soon as I left my building and that on top of everything else, I think the universe was telling me I should have stayed home. But I was determined to get my morning fix of coffee and maybe the rain would stop soon anyway. I made my way to the counter and ordered a large americano, and then took a seat near the back. I sipped my drink slowly, watching the rain hit the sidewalk outside. I don't know what it was about the rain but it always put me in a nostalgic mood.
