A Promise

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When I was a kid, I had a bad habit of hiding in dark places. It led me to hear things I shouldn't have.

"I'm ruined Dina. They've made us obsolete."

The sound of sobbing.

"I hate it here, Dad. Why do I always have to come with you? Eli is such a kid. She's annoying."

The sound of smacks.

Everyone saw me as fragile. I was born two months premature and it seemed I was destined to play catch up my whole life. A small and clumsy child, always too innocent and sensitive to be exposed to the world's harsh realities. A clumsy thing. Always getting hurt. Always picked last. Everyone always working to keep me safe. But they didn't know that I heard everything.

Saw everything.

My mom's flushed cheeks when dad wasn't in town.

The way my dad shook as he stifled his sobs, a bottle of cognac clutched between bone white fingers.

The boy who hated me. The tall beautiful boy who called me plain and dumb and a nuisance. The boy whose dad hit him in just the right places so that people couldn't see the bruises.

Maybe they were right to try to shield me. It doesn't matter. I kept the secrets deep within me and they festered. Burning away and blackening my insides until the day I decide to set them free. But I'm not ready to let them go. Not yet.

I need the fire they feed, the cruelty they foster. I need them to take down the man that brought all the pain. I need them to destroy his company. His love and god.

I'm going to burn it all to the ground.

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