bro... (baldi's basics fanfic lemon smut uwuwuwuwuwu)

i love u < 3 (first prize x reader)

You were in class, just learning and shit y'know? And you were sitting right next to this robo bitch. You felt very uncomfortable whenever you were near him. He just looked stupid as shit, plus he probably spoke in like cursive or something.

"ALRIGHT KIDS WHAT IS 2+2?" Baldi fucking yelled in his stupid ass voice. The robo bitch, being the stupid ass he is, tried to raise his hand, but couldn't because he's a fucking loser I mean because his hands can't go that high.

"Yes, First Prize?" You finally learned this stupid ass robot's name. First Prize. What a fucking dumb name.

"2-22?!" He said in his stupid ass robotic voice. What a dumbass. You just want to fucking snap his nonexistant neck.

"No Prize, it's 4. See?" First Prize was so dumb that Baldi had to show him the answer. He probably has problems learning, you thought, but nah, he's just a dumbass.

"Can you count with me?" Baldi went close to First Prize, and spoke to him in a calm, happy tone. How come he doesn't talk like that to the other students? Probably because First Prize is fucking spoiled or some shit. What a fucking loser, you thought.

"1.."

"2.."

"3.." Baldi stopped to let First Prize say the last number.

"..."

"Wait! You said it was 4, right? A-And there's 1, 2, which are 2 numbers! So then, there's 3... and..."

"4!" Baldi and First Prize said at the same time. First Prize giggled, seeming to have fun.

"It took you THAT LONG?" You whispered to First Prize in a harsh tone as soon as Baldi was distracted.

"I-I thought.. 22 was the answer..." First Prize was clearly hurt by the harsh tone you were speaking in. You looked at First Prize angrily, you couldn't believe how much of a dumbass he was.

"No you fucking idiot, it's 4. 4." You hissed at First Prize. Despite being a robot, First Prize actually showed emotion, and started to (somehow) tear up. He was about to cry.

"I-I'm s-sorry I d-didn't know.. I-I-Is that bad?"

"Yes you fucking dumbass! How can anyone not know what 2+2 is?!"

"*sniff sniff*"

"aAAaAAAaaA" First Prize started crying, which got Baldi's attention.

"First Prize! What's wrong?!" He went over to the little robot, kneeling down.

"I'm sorry.."

"For what?"

"I didn't know w-what 2+2 was..." Baldi gasped, sad that First Prize would ever think he did something wrong by not knowing an answer.

"Oh First Prize.. You don't need to be sorry... It's okay, we all make mistakes." Baldi hugged First Prize, trying to assure him it was alright.

"B-But (Y/N) told me it was bad.." You were surprised First Prize knew your name, because you two have never ever interacted before. Baldi instantly looked towards you. You were fucked.

"UUH" You stammered, as Baldi drew out his ruler and looked at you in rage.

"Principle's office, NOW." He pointed towards the door with his ruler, hissing a bit. You got up, and went out the door, slamming it behind you. When you slammed the door, you could hear First Prize scream a bit. What a pussy, you thought.

----at the principle's office uwuwuwuwuwu----

"I can't believe I got detention because of that fucking dumbass robot.." You hissed to yourself, waiting until your detention sentence was up. Break time was coming soon, and your detention sentence lasted until break time started, so you didn't worry as bad as you should've.

----uhh fast forward 5 minutes----

"WOOHOO BrEAK TIME" You bursted out of the principle's office, screaming in excitement. While walking to the place you usually go during break time, you bumped into First Prize.

"U-Uhm.. Hey (Y/N)!" First Prize gave you a weak smile. You knew he was crying the entire class period. You actually felt bad for him...

"Hey... First.. Prize.." You awkwardly smiled back at First Prize, looking at him. You were probably, like, several feet taller than him, probably 2 feet at the most.

"I wanted to a-apologize for earlier.." First Prize sighed, looking at you like a sad little toddler.

"I'm sorry I didn't know the answer.. I just... It's hard for me to learn... I say the answers that first come to mind before I actually think about the problem.. I guess I just.. Want to... Make people happy. Make people.. You know..." First Prize struggled to say the word he was thinking of.

"Actually... Proud.. of me.." First Prize started to tear up. Now you really felt bad for what you said to him. He really does have a hard life..

"No, I should be the one who's sorry... I.. Shouldn't have been so hard on you.." You looked at First Prize, who's trying to understand you, but is having a hard time comprehending the fact that he wasn't the one who did the bad thing.

"Wait you did the bad thing?"

"Yeah.." You tried to explain why you were the bad person in the situation, but First Prize didn't really understand.

You ended up sitting down with First Prize, and getting to know him more.

"You know, I've never had an actual relationship.. Nor have I done anything sexual.." You suddenly confessed to First Prize. You didn't actually regret it.. It was like... You two just became lifelong buds right there and then.

"I haven't done this 'sexual' thing either! Maybe we can do it together?" First Prize looked at you in excitement, clearly not knowing what sexual stuff was.

"Well if you wanna do that.. We need to go somewhere more private.." You grabbed First Prize's hand, and began searching for a more private place.

You eventually found a classroom that was seemingly never used, you thought this was private enough.

"A-Alright.. D-Do you know what... Uhm.." You stammered.

"G-Gets you off..?" You looked at First Prize, him visibly confused.

"What do you mean?" You realized that First Prize didn't really understand any of this, so you just decided to experiment.

"N-Nevermind.. Let me just... See what does.." You started to feel First Prize, experimenting. You finally reached his sensitive spot: His heart. You gave it a gentle squeeze.

"Nnn..~" First Prize moaned a little, confused about what he was feeling.

"Huh.. How does it feel when I do that?" You looked up at First Prize. You were kneeling down just to reach his heart, that's how short the robot was.

"It gives me butterflies.." First Prize was having trouble trying to understand the feeling. You kept on squeezing First Prize's heart, hearing him moan with each squeeze. You two began to makeout somehow, you still squeezing the robot's heart.

You then hear the door opening...

"I--" IT WAS THE FUCKING SOCK

"O-Oh.... Uh.. S-S-Sorry, wrong time?--" Arts and Crafters realized what was happening.

"oH MY GOD! PRINCIPLE! (Y-Y/N) AND FIRST P-P-PRIZE ARE HAVING S-SEX!!" Arts and Crafters sprinted towards the principle's office.

"shit" You were fucking terrified. You saw the invisible glitchy man and Principle of the Thing burst into the room. the invisible man had a fucking shotgun.

"YOU FUCKING MY SON" you promptly got fucking shot

"fuck" You screeched.

hehe you're not fucking the robot today thotties