Lisa's Heartaches (Jenlisa)

Behind My Smile 2

A/N: ctto of pictures that I used. Thankssss💗

Lisa's Point Of View

After so many days. My Mom suddenly says that we will go back to Thailand. Am I happy? Maybe. Because I'm not gonna see Jennie anymore. I can heal myself without her.

I am walking home after going to Chaeng's house. I already told her everything. When suddenly someone called me.
"Lisa"
I know that voice how will I ever forget her voice?
"Jennie" I smiled at her.
"Can we talk?" She looked down.
"Of course yes" I answered her.

Both of us are walking. Silence. This is awkward. Really damn awkward.

"Lisa about what hap--" I cut her.
"Don't force yourself to talk to me. You don't have to. If you feel guilty or what, you don't have to be sorry" I looked at her in eyes.
"Lisa are you really going to Thailand? Will you leave me?" She asked me.
"Jen-nie" damn her eyes became teary.
"I'm sorry" she sobbed.
"I'll stay Jennie if you will make me stay. I'll stay with you. But just this once let me heal for myself. I'm so broken. I don't know." I want to cry. I really want to.
"I'm sorry Lisa. I'm sorry. I want to choose you but I cant." I am really shocked on what she said.
"What are you trying to say Jennie?" I hold her hand.
"Lisa. Let me go!" She sobbed harder.
"What are you trying to say Jennie?!" I shouted at her. I can't think straight.
"I LOVE YOU LISA! I really do. But I can't fight for this love. This is so wrong" she pushed me.
"Jen-nie?" I whispered. I didn't expect everything she said.
"I can't choose us Lisa. You know my parents are homophobic. They despised this kind of love. They believed that this is a sick that needed to be cure. They will throw me out of their lives. They will hate. I can't live without them Lisa. I really can't. I thought I was strong but I am not. I rather choose myself than you. And I know someday you will find someone you deserve and not like me. Maybe this is really a sick! I hate my self for loving you. We're both girlsss! I hate myself!" Jennie shouted. I am shocked. I am hurt. I don't know what to say.
"Okay" I replied. I want to cry. I want to shout. I want to hurt her but I know I can't.

I walk away. I shut people out. I agreed to go back to Thailand. I never let them contact me again. I want to be a new Lisa. A strong one. And a LOVABLE one.