Jellybean Jones

Chapter 88: Two-Faced Bitch

PSA: The dashes indicate when the texting starts and stops.

Jellybean POV
"What is is specifically that worries you?" Sasha asked. I had confided in her about my worries about high school starting Monday. Today was Saturday.

"I'm..." I stared at a splatter painting on the wall. I felt awkward, I really didn't know what to say. There wasn't one specific thing that had me so worked up. "I don't know." I admitted shyly, looking back at her.

"That's okay." She said comfortingly. "I'll try to prompt you. Do you think it's about friends, a new place, new teachers, more work, different people, or anything like that at all?" She asked gently.

I looked at my lap and considered it, it almost seemed like I was worried about everything. "I think I'm worried about all of those things, maybe even more." I said quietly.

"Okay." She said, nodding. "Let's work with that. I think we should break everything down. Starting with the friends aspect." She began. "Are you worried about not having friends?" She questioned.

"Yeah...I only really have Rosie. Especially after Adelaide left. I'm just worried that I'm not going to meet new people and I'll be alone at lunch and I won't be social and stuff like that." I explained.

She nodded. "That's reasonable, but I don't think it should really be a concern of yours. I know saying this isn't going to help, but it will be okay. You just have to convince yourself first." She paused.

"So what I want to do now is go through all the other reasons you might be worried and then I have a strategy that I think might work to help guy relieve some of those worries, okay?" She said, looking determined.

I nodded in agreement. After going through my worries, she pulled out a fresh notepad and a pen. She was always taking notes.

"Okay, so," She began as she drew a rectangle. She then drew a line, cutting the rectangle in half lengthwise, then broke up those two halves. "I call this a worry spectrum." She told me.

"This end is the worried end, and this end is the not a care in the world end." She said, motioning to the opposite end. I nodded. "So, when you're on the worried end of the spectrum, in a word, how are you feeling?" She questioned.

I hesitated. "Uh...distraught?" I asked. She nodded encouragingly. "Perfect." She replied, writing distraught at the worried end. "And what about at this end?" She asked, pointing to the not worried end.

"Oh...um...relieved, maybe? I don't really know." I said awkwardly. "That's great." She assured, writing down relieved.

"Okay, so now the middle of the spectrum. How are you feeling when you've come to terms with the thing you're worried about?" She asked.

"Content." I said, almost immediately. She wrote it down in the middle of the rectangle.

"Alright, now a step about distraught and a step below content." She continued.

I looked at the ceiling, thinking. "Mildly uncomfortable?" I asked. She laughed lightly. "Mildly uncomfortable." She repeated, writing it.

"Now a step above content and a step below relieved?" She asked.

"At ease." I answered. "I'm at ease with what I'm worried about." I added. She wrote it down.

"So right now," She began, showing me the worry spectrum. "I would say you're here, at distraught, about your worries about high school. What you can do about that is try to convince yourself that you're actually mildly uncomfortable. Does that make sense?" She asked.