Until You Came | 2kim

Fin.

Years Ago*
A bright and sunny day, perfect for couples to spend time with. It was sunday, a day that we get to spend all our time either going to a movie theater, to a ice cream store, or just stay at my apartment. 
 
 
This time we both decided that staying at my apartment was a better choice. You said that it would be great spending only the two of us and no one around us. I loved the idea, it was never new to me for we both have been doing this mostly. 
 
 
But what you said had another meaning to it, I knew it, I just never said anything. I know you have been trying to spend more time with me and just me, but I never complained, why would I? Atleast I get to spend more time with the person who I love the most. 
 
 
You could have told me what has been bothering you lately, I wanted you to share your problems to me, I didn't like seeing you getting distress and not even telling me the reason. But you never pushed me away instead you tried to hide that you were okay, even though you weren't, but I was foolish to notice it. 
 
 
You came to my apartment wearing a smile, the smile that I always love seeing and would never get tired of seeing it every single day. You gladly gave me a warm hug, I also returned it. This time I was for sure knew that something was wrong-- No, this time I knew that what your mother told me was true. My heart ache seeing you all pale and getting skinnier than what the usual you looked like. I didn't want to tell you that I knew everything, I waited for you to tell me instead. Seeing you still give me those genuine smile made my heart ache much more.
 
"Minjoo-yah, you know I would always be there for you"
 
I said flashing smiles, instead of answering me, you tighten our hug. I couldn't breathe, but I won't complain. The first thing I knew was to pat you back and caress your hair.
 
You cried, I saw that coming, but was never prepared, albeit gave you a comforting hug. The sobbing got louder, I wouldn't blame you for that. You were stress from overthinking to much. I knew every little thing about you, about it, but chose to stay quiet.
 
We were still hugging each other until I told you to change and join me in the couch once your done. You followed my order. After minutes of waiting for you to come outside my room, I was anxious while waiting, it took you long enough that I had to come and check inside to see if your okay. And you were fine, perfectly fine, but you were sitting at my bed with your head down low. I could tell that you were crying again. 
 
'God I wish I was the one who was suffering, instead of her'
 
I went and sat beside you, lifting your chin to match my eyes. Those red puffy eyes. I hated seeing those all the time, but this time it can't be helped. Tried comforting you again by letting both of us lay down on my bed, with you resting on my arm while we both had our hands intertwined.
 
The wall clock ticking and you sobbing was the only thing that could be heard in the room. I wanted to cry with you but I couldn't, I had to be strong for you, for both of us. 
 
After sometime you made your decisions and told me what was happening, I listen to it thoroughly even though I already knew it. Once you finished telling me what has been happening lately you cried again. 
 
"Don't give up okay minjoo-yah, for us, for me, you have to fight it" I told you, giving a fist bump, you lightly bump it with your other hand.
 
I was happy to see you smile again.
 
But you said something that made my tears fell.
 
"I can't anymore chaewon-ah" You said to me with a shaky voice
"Promise me you will move on and find someone who loves you more than I do, okay?"
There, there it was, that sentence. This time it was me who was crying instead of you, I don't want to love someone else minjoo. You know that I only love you.
"N-no, it's not fair, it really isn't" 
I said crying louder, I was mad at the god for making you suffer. I couldn't help but to cry like a baby. you are my everything minjoo, I don't know what I would do without you.
 
You comforted me even though I should be the one doing that to you now.
"I love you, always remember that, my fairy chaewon"
Why do you always have to be the one who gets sick, but this time it would be the last.
 
"I can't minjoo, please princess, let's battle it together"
 
You just gave me a smile and nod your head. 
 
Why does life need to be this unfair. I still had many plans for the both of us, I even thought of spending my life with you. I don't know if I could handle it minjoo, I'm not capable for it. I'm never ready for it-- im not ready to start a life without you. You complete me, and me living my life without you would be useless. 
 
'You will be my ruin'
I thought but you always told me that I would move on, that I could move on. Someday.
 
"I love you so much, kim minjoo"
"I love you too chaewonnie" You said to me, while you snuggle into my neck.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
*Present time*
The sun was salmon and hazy in the west. I was at the beach, sitting, looking over at the sky.
 
"How are you up there, minjoo?"
"I miss you...
 
so much" I said choking between the words.
 
Why did you leave me, minjoo, I thought that we would fight it, together. I told you so that we would, but I can't blame you. You were already tired, I also did tell you that you could rest now, that you don't have to worry about me. I wanted you to leave with an ease heart. God how I wish you were still here with me seeing this beautiful scenery. I imagined what it would have been for the both of us, maybe we would get married, or travel the world like you always wanted. 
 
"Minjoo-yah, I've been saving, I thought of that travelling the world just how you wanted it" I screamed at the sky, don't care if people would think I'm crazy or not.
 
I looked over to a small store far away from me, a figure appeared, I smiled at the sight of that person. She was slowly walking towards me, as she smile back at me with love in her eyes. I look back at the sky, inhaling the beach smell.
 
"But it changed, until she came, I'm slowly letting go of the past minjoo. I know you wanted me to, but I won't forget all the memories that I had with you. I'm letting go of the past for you to be at peace now." Once again screamed at the sky, quickly wiping traces of my tears the fell.
 
"Chaewonnie" My girlfriend called out for me, making me run over to her and enveloping her into a tight hug.
"Is everything okay?" She asked
I am thankful to meet someone who is also lovable, she knows about my past, about minjoo. I thought that if I tell you about it you would leave me, but no, you made think me love you more. You were patient to me, for me to move on, I was thankful, I learned to accept the reality and now move on. You made me believe in love again, I know minjoo would have been so thankful for you, she would have been glad to know that I am being well taken care of. 
"I'm okay, I love you hiichan"
I know that it takes time to heal this heart ache of mine, but i know there is someone helping me go through it, and it's my girlfriend, Hitomi.
 
As we both now walk away at the beach.
 
 
'I hope your okay up there minjoo-yah. Thank you for making me happier that I always have been minjoo but I guess I could now return back the love hitomi has been giving me. Thank you for making those happy, exciting memories with me minjoo, I can't easily forget about you, you know I can't. But I am now ready to let go of the past, the past that was keeping me from moving on, I know you are happy for me to have someone again, someone who loves me too just you did. Maybe in next life if we're destined to be with each other we would meet again, and I promise you that I would make you the happiest girl ever. Thank you for everything and goodbye minjoo'
**
"It has been said, 'time heals all wounds.' I do not agree. The wounds remain. In time, the mind, protecting its sanity, covers them with scar tissue and the pain lessens. But it is never gone." 
-― Rose Fitzgerald Kennedy
**
"They say time heals all wounds, but that presumes the source of the grief is finite" 
― Cassandra Clare, Clockwork Prince
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That was the end, It probably sucks idk. But y'all I honestly had the urge to cry but I didn't so horray i guess?

Anywho, that was it. Thank you for reading.

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