The Royal Game (one shots)

Lost and Found

(Roleplayed by Flamin' and Havo)
(Don't know what part was and wasn't the beginning so it's a bit confusing, sorry)

If chris has the ability (and will) to change his appearance, it's literally a done deal since he could slip into the crowd and never be found again.
After a couple of months, he just starts to lose hope.
It's thrilling to live a new life, to finally undo what you did wrong in the first life and correcting them whenever you got the chance.  make new friends who see you differently.  but the guilt of losing what you have weighs you down, and sometimes you have to choose if you want what exists even if it means little or your pretend world you lost yourself in.
"Guess I missed a memo or something."
He just doesn't react at all. No laughing, no response.
"God . . . I really fucked up didn't I?"  Chris looks down, biting his lip.
"...Do...Do you know how long I was alone before I met you?...How long I was on my own?...I thought..." Luke wipes his sleeve across his eyes as he starts crying. "I l-lost hope after a few months, Chris. I-I thought I was going to be alone again."
"About 200 years without my damned existence, yeah . . ." A dry laugh followed, though it felt forced and inappropriate.  It was the wrong move, fuck.  His face dropped again, his eyes never moving from the old floorboards.  Chris never hated himself, but every drip of resentment sunk through whatever self esteem he had and destroyed it.

"Look," he sighed, "I really didn't mean to leave you in the dark.  In fact, I was going to send a letter of sorts to your house.  I just, never did and I really don't know why."  Every word just added a brick of tension and Chris hated it.  Fucking Hell, can he even form a simple apology like a normal person?  "I just, don't know.  I don't even remember why I disappeared."
Luke wanted to respond. He had so many questions to ask the man in front of him and so many things that he wanted to say. He wanted to know why. Why did he leave? Why couldn’t Chris have told him? Why...Why hadn’t Luke seen this coming in the first place? How did he miss the signs? Were there any to begin with?
     The longer he stood staring at the one who had sent him into a downward spiral half a year ago, the more his thoughts became jumbled and confused. Only one question stood out among the rest, resisting the uncontrolled storm inside of him that had swept all the others away. It was one that had been haunting him since the whole ordeal had started.
Luke began to idly play with one of the bells on his sleeve, tilting his head and breaking the silence by quietly asking “…Was it something that I did?”.
Chris' eyes widened, his head shooting up.  His unkempt hair fell into his eyes, and he might've pulled something minor, but that was not the reply he was waiting for.  He thought he would've been bombarded with questions like his parents had done or even slapped to begin with.  Chris had done something so selfish and insincere and all Luke has to ask was if it was his fault?

"No, God no.  It wasn't your fault to even begin with.  I, uh," Chris ran a hand through his hair to keep it from going everywhere, "just left.  Leaving wasn't an option until it was, and I took it."

Fuck, why did Luke have to blame himself?  He had no involvement in this giant mess, and it killed Chris to know that the fault is with his one and only friend (are they even friends anymore?).  Why'd have to be so fucking stupid Chris?  You fucking left everyone in the dust to pick up after your mess while you chased after some outlandish dream alone.  It's as if you're destined to be the lonely tree on the hill; tall and mighty with no one.

Stopping his twisting of the dangling bell, Luke looked at the tarnished sphere. "Then why did you choose to come back? That kind of freedom must have been great." The blonde once again wiped his eyes, well aware that the show of tears was in no way masking the exhaustion that he had been feeling the last few days. Adjusting his gaze to the floorboards at his feet, he sighed, "At least, I can imagine it was..."
"Freedom is subjective.  You might live in a place that grants that privilege, but how much of it do you really feel when you're being stopped at every turn?  Sure, living as someone new is cool, but the lies and constant memories strip it of the fun."  Chris had to look away from Luke, he couldn't cry.  Crying is a weakness for masculinity; if you cry you're still a boy.  His chest was rising and falling quickly though as he tried to keep it all together.  Come on, keep it together.