Someone You Loved {KiriBaku/BakuShima Fanfic}

Chapter IV

Bakugou opened the door and immediately pulled the redhead in. But it became awkward, fast.

As he yanked Kirishima, he stumbled and ended up on top of the explosive boy, who growled and gave a harsh glare.

"Get the fuck off of me. You're heavy!" He pushed him off as the redhead laughed, clutching his wet clothes.

"You're the one who caused it!" A bright smile lit up the room and Bakugou couldn't help but stare. Until he gained some self control and crossed his arms.

"Get the fuck up. We need to talk." Bakugou sat crisscrossed on his bed and he gripped his knee caps. Kirishima tossed his wet belongings to the side and did the same thing in front of the bed on the floor, giving him his full attention.

"Go ahead. I got nothing to hide." Bakugou studies him for a second and could see the buried sadness and heartbreak glint in his eyes and small smile. He hesitated, wondering what the say.

"Why do you call your mom by her first name? Is that a cultural thing?" he managed to ask, though flinching as the giggle Kirishima made was fake.

"No, it's not cultural anything. I was born and raised in Japan and so were my two moms." Bakugou's eyes widened a bit.

"Two?"

"Yeah...they went to go serve once the war started. I was only 6 but I remember receiving news about their deaths like it was yesterday...and I was put up for adoption..." His eyes darkened as his lips created a thin white line. "I didn't even get to go to their funeral to say my goodbyes." Tears welled up in his eyes and Bakugou couldn't help but feel his pain.

"I...get it...my old hag died in the war too," he found himself saying, making the redhead look up at him. "I still have the letter from 3 years ago. But my dad just started getting back to normal again. Sort of." The blond clutches his forearms as a swallow of pride. "And I kinda invited you over so I could apologize-"

"More like dragged me?" A chuckle bubbled from his chest as Bakugou threw a pillow, knocking him over.

Bakugou let out a snort before pouting. "Shut the fuck up." After regaining his composure he continued. "It's just that, I have a hard time with people, always have, always will. I guess it's just easier to push people away and assume shit than letting them see what the fuck is wrong with you."

"You don't have to apologize Bakugou, I grew up with it. You're not the first person to treat me like I'm the plague." He smiled sadly and for some reason, made Katsuki feel like his world was collapsing again.

     "Really?" His voice was so small, and he hugged the pillow tightly, digging his nails, heels and chin in the cushion. For the first time in a couple of years, water droplets rolled down Kirishima's cheeks silently. He watched as Kirishima nodded, looking at the ground with that all too familiar grin, one Bakugou knew really well as he had experienced it before. "I....I'm really sorry...I'm......horrible..." Bakugou buried his face in his pillow and sobbed, startling Kirishima to the point he jumps up.

"Hey hey hey! Stop it! You're not horrible-"

"Yes I fucking am! I did said so many bad things!" Bakugou yelled. "And...and...my dad...he's been mourning for three fucking years in his bedroom and I did nothing to help him!" He pulled at his hair and gritted his teeth. "I'm the dumbest bastard in the planet. I'm the one that should've died, not-"

"Stop it Bakugou! None of this is your fault ya'know!" Kirishima tugged at the blond wrist as if he was pleading. "It's not karma if multiple people were affected by the same grief. And you were kind enough to give your dad some space. You might be abrasive and... oblivious at times, but don't you ever put yourself down like this..." His voice got increasingly quieter as Bakugou's hands retracted from his hair slowly. "This isn't your fault. And your mom wouldn't want you to feel like this. No parent or friends would..."

Bakugou went limp. His hands fell on his lap. The fat tears threatening to roll down his face ceased and he breathed slowly. Kirishima still had a hold on his wrist.

"How...do you manage to get up everyday?"

"Hm?" Eijirou was surprised when Bakugou broke the silence, especially with a question like that. "What do you mean?"

"You...I just lost my mom....but you lost both your parents...and you always receive cold glares from people...you're always smiling without a care in the world...how can you do that? How can you be like that with all that despair weighing you down like a boulder?" Bakugou met his eyes, confusion and curiosity gleaming over the dark red irises. His brows furrowed a bit and his lips twisted into a frown. His eyes were rimmed with pink and his stained cheeks held the same color.

Getting past the weird thoughts and words catching in his throat, he managed to mutter, "Because no one wants to be around a depressed person all the time."

     He smiled, "The happier you are, the easier it is to make friends. And friends make you less lonely, and are helpful if the right ones come along. To me, being sad is just a waste of time because it does you no good." He grinned brightly at the wide eyed blond. "I'm not saying it's wrong to be sad, everyone has those days where they feel empty inside. But being sad all day everyday will get you nowhere and is unhealthy. And being happy is the same as well as anger. We're only human and we feel a lot of emotions, and it's healthy to experience all of them in our life time, even if they hurt like hell."

     Kirishima chuckled as Bakugou stared at him dumbfounded.

"How the fuck...? You sound like a bloody therapist!" Bakugou threw another pillow at him while screaming "Fuck you!"

Kirishima chucked the pillow back and they ended up getting stuffing all over the carpet before tripping over each other and landing on their backs.

Then they laughed like maniacs. And Bakugou felt like he had the world at his will for once. He could do anything.

He felt happy.

_________________________________________
Song : Happy? by Nico Collins.

Published August 21 2019
Edited December 15 2022