As I said I had my fill of being the good girlfriend and wife to be treated like shit so I had decided I would from then on use them the way I had always been used. No use in putting myself in a position to be hurt again.
You can judge if you want but don't throw stones. I throw back. I had went down to my brother Landon's house who lived at the end of the park. I sat around just talking for a bit he was telling me that Richard had asked about my situation.
" He's married." I said
" That's been over for a long time. But he says your beautiful Jayla not sexy or any of that bullshit." Landon said then someone knocked on the door.
Landon grinned opening the door. Richard walked in. Have I said that he's sexy. Oh yea sexy. I had thought he looked good since the first time I saw him when I was thirteen years old.
" What you doing?" He asked giving me that panty dropping smile.
" Just hanging out. Got to go meet Brice at the house in a few." I replied smiling at him
"Oh y'all working it out? " He asked
" Oh no, that's way over has been for years." I told him
" Ya I know all about that. When it becomes a job just raising the kids." He replied
" Well I realized staying in a bad relationship is worse than separating and being happy. So that's what I plan on doing." I said
It had gotten late it was time for Brice to be getting there. I got up to hug my brother. " Gotta go. Love ya." I said after giving him a hug .
" Bye Richard see ya around." I said giving him my flirty smile.
All the way back to my house I thought about how wrong it was to sit there flirting with a man I knew to be married but the truth is I didn't care. If he was happy he'd be home instead of here after dark.
If he was mine I could think of better things to do after dark. Alright Jayla get any of those thoughts out of your head. No more relationships. A good time maybe. Then he could go home to his wife and life goes on. I know it's horrible but again I don't care anymore.
I walked the rest of the way to my house. When I walked up on the porch Brice pulled up. He brought me a cup of coffee. " Thank you. I'll need this unpacking everything." I said taking the coffee from him. I opened the door and let him inside. I showed him the kids bedrooms and the living room.
He sits down on the couch and looks around. " Your moving on without me." He said in a soft voice. I sat on the couch opposite of him.
" Well ya and you should do the same." I told him.
" I'm sorry for the way things turned out. I wish it had been different." He said standing to leave. " Are you sure there's no way to fix us?" He asked.
" I'm sorry too but no we can't. What's done is done." I said. He nodded and walked out leaving me in my empty house.
The next couple weeks flew and it was Brice's weekend again. I was bored when the kids were gone. But I had been seeing alot of Richard in the trailer park. There's been alot of flirting and I had told him if he had nothing better to do tonight he was welcome to come over. He wanted to take me to dinner but I wasn't looking for a date. I figured he was all talk. I knew he had a crush even when lived here before. He would make little comments anytime he saw me. Thinking back to the first time I realized he checked me out as much as I did him. I laughed out loud.
I had walked to the pay phone I wasn't trying to impress anyone so I was were my sweat pants and a baggy shirt. I was walking back to the house when I heard. " Hey brat." I turned to see Richard driving by.
" Oh yea?" I replied
" Ohhh yeah." He said and drove on.
It wasn't until later that I realized he was looking at my butt and made it known. I was washing dishes and when I finished I dried my hands and brushed them across my bottom my pants had brat written across there.
Now here I am wondering if he's really going to show. I had all bad intentions. I won't lie. I had thought many times what his hands would feel like. And his lips and his... Well you get the point.
I looked at the time it was 8:30. Well I don't guess he's coming I thought I should get ready for bed. I was about to change when I heard a knock on the door. I got up and went to the door. There he stood looking as sexy as ever. It took everything I was made of to control myself.
" You ready?" He asked giving me that smile. He has no idea what it does to me.
" Um..I already ate." I told him. I wasn't trying to start a relationship with him. Just an agreement. I wanted him to come over on the weekends when my kids weren't home. I didn't want to sleep around I just wanted one guy that knew what he was doing that wanted something with no strings. Someone who wouldn't be sleeping around either and I was hoping he would be the one.
" Oh OK, well you want to come sit outside on the bench with me?" He asked. No talking is not what I want to be doing. I thought.
" Sure." I said walking out on the porch.
We sat out on the porch and talked. Looking up at the stars.
" The stars give me peace." I said "when everything around me was chaos I found peace in the night sky."
" I just can't believe I'm sitting here with Jayla Harding. All the years of thinking about you and now I'm here." He said looking into my eyes.
It was strange I felt safe sitting there looking in his eyes. I felt the peace of the stars.
I opened up to him. We talked about everything. Our past and my marriage . How my kids were taking my divorce.
" It's hard for them right now but it gets better everyday. The arguing wasn't good for them and now they have a mom and dad that can be happy with them." I explained
" I would have left before but I didn't want to hurt my girls." He said." But I see Jax and Hylis are OK now."
" Well kids are not an excuse to stay in a loveless marriage." I replied
" Anyone would be crazy to treat you like that. You deserve so much better." He said.
" Ya well I have lost all faith in men, I don't want to give anyone the opportunity to hurt me anymore. All the men in my life have hurt me and or left me except my (b) dad. So I decided to play with my hands and not my heart." I told him
We sat there for awhile in a comfortable silence just looking up at the sky. I was completely confused by him. I know he knew what I wanted from him but instead of finding myself wrapped in the sheets with him I found myself just wrapped up in him. The way he spoke to me and about me. Like he saw through me. He knew I wasnt the person I was trying to be but that's who I desperately wanted to be. I didn't want to be the girl that fell in love only to regret it later. I had spent my whole life in that circle.
" You know I have never been able to do this with anyone before" He said breaking the silence.
" What?" I asked confused.
" Sit and talk about my life and my past like this." He said
" Me either." I said
" Well I guess I better go it's getting late." He Said. " But I'm not leaving without at least a hug."
" I can do that." I said wrapping my arms around his neck.
He lifted me off the ground and held me like that looking into my eyes.
" You know your smile and those eyes have always got to me." He said and then he stole a kiss.
After he left I replayed the night in my mind over and over again. How good his arms felt around me and his lips. But the thing that got me was the peace I found had found in him.
I found myself wanting more. More of his laugh..his touch.. his words..his presence. More of him.
YOU ARE READING
Jayla (My Story)
Non-FictionThis is a story of the tests of life and faith. Even before she was born life had it in for Jayla. Death, cancer and divorce are just some of the battles she would face as a small child. Then as a teen her life turned into a nightmare. As Jayla live...
