Chapter Twenty-four: Back to the Start

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Alex's POV:

Somehow, life had gotten better. Never would I have ever guessed that I, Alex Gaskarth, was going to be hung up on some girl for so long. I wasn't the one who was even remotely interested in anything other than the physical aspect of a relationship, but somehow I was following around this girl, telling her that that part didn't even matter. All I wanted was friendship. It was strange. I only realized that I was as soon as things started going well.

I was so used to trying to get through to the girl that was playing hard to get that I didn't even have the mental capacity to think through all my actions. Now that she was finally opening up to me and letting me be around her, it was quite a change. What I now knew was annoying behavior, wasn't needed for her to notice me. Somehow her breaking up with Devon got her to warm up.

Ever since she let me come along with her when she went on a short walk in her neighborhood, I knew that we actually had a sort of friendship going on. She wouldn't get mad at me anymore every single time I came up to her, and she actually didn't need to be dragged to lunch. Of course, she didn't show up to class every single time, but she was always somewhere at school, especially with that broken arm of her's preventing her from actually leaving.

I'll straight up admit that I might have let her leave one time... in my car... with me driving... Jack joining us and Rian having rolled his eyes at us. Don't worry, the usual mischief Mickey was involved in didn't occur that time. We basically just drove around and didn't do anything other than listen to the music playing on the radio.

So, to sum it all up. Things were fucking great.

But, as you can probably sense, it didn't last all that long.

Contrary to how long it took Mickey to change to this nice person, she turned cold again in no time. While I was so used to the behavior just weeks before, her turning back to it so suddenly did take me aback. I wasn't expecting it at all.

It all started at lunch. I hadn't seen her the entire day since we didn't have any classes together, but Jack said that she hadn't shown up to the class he shared with her either. Rian, however, said that he had seen her around in the hallways, so she definitely was at school. That wasn't what was different, though. She also did eventually show up to our table, but without any food, which was quite strange.

"So, Mickey, you ready for the test tomorrow?" Rian asked her, trying to start up a conversation despite the slightly off mood hanging around us.

"Test?" She breathed out, showing she couldn't be less disinterested than she was at that moment, rolling her eyes at him.

He stared silently at her for a second or two before continuing, trying to brush it off as something she didn't mean. "Yeah, the AP calculus test? Most people are freaking out about it, it's like the only thing you hear in the halls right now."

"AP calculus?" She asked next, shaking her head, wondering what she even had to do with his story and probably thinking he was just trying to make small talk. She never really liked small talk, but she hadn't been so bitchy lately.

I decided to take over before she bit Rian's head off. "Yeah... you switched classes, remember? You somehow went from my class all the way up."

"Wait, what? I switched classes?" She laughed and hit her hand against the table, continuing in a sarcastic tone. "Well, shit, aren't I screwed?"

"Does this mean you never showed up to a class?" Rian's eyes went wide as he started scolding her, his babysitter hat on. "Mickey, you switched weeks ago!"

"Well, guess I'll be showing up tomorrow, won't I?" She shrugged and stood up, taking her bag with her as she left us without another word.

I was left confused as her red hair slowly disappeared behind all the students in the distance. What was going on with her? I didn't recall anything being said that could possibly piss her off. Maybe she just didn't want it to be a known fact that she was actually really good at a subject most people thought she was failing. I didn't really understand why that would have been a bad thing, but then again maybe she thought it would ruin her reputation. But wouldn't she have thought hanging out with us also would have been bad for her reputation? Maybe she was just killing two birds with one stone...

"The fuck did you do?!" Jack exclaimed, reaching across the table to hit my head.

"Me? I didn't do shit!" I shook my head, immediately going for the defensive route.

"Why else would she suddenly be such a bitch?"

"I don't know," I seethed, glaring at him as I rubbed the spot that was slightly throbbing, "but something's obviously wrong."

"Maybe it's just her time of the month," Rian suggested with a shrug as he continued eating his lunch. By now, he knew how to deal with Mickey acting out. Which way was that? By practically ignoring it and letting her be her.

I shook my head even though I didn't even know if that was the case. "I'm going to find out."

Jack scrunched up his nose in disgust. "You're going to find out if she's on her--"

"No!" I interrupted before he could finish his sentence, not even wanting to go further down that road. "I'm going to find out what's wrong."

"Be careful," Rian told me as I got up from my seat as well, my lunch only half finished. "Bring some aloe vera for the burns."

I completely ignored his comment, not needing his negativity if I knew for a fact Mickey was going to blow up on me as well. If anything, Rian had to be thankful that I was willing to take one for the team and figure out what was up. I was willing to let myself be Mickey's punching bag just so that we could all know why the hell she was back to acting like her old self again.

I went out the same exact way she did, hoping to find her somewhere close. Although I was dying to know what was going on with her, I also didn't feel like having to search throughout the entire school and surrounding streets. Honestly, if she was that far away, I would have just said she didn't want to be found and then try again later.

But it didn't even come to that point.

I saw her rush into the nearest bathroom, stopping me from even starting my search. Perhaps Rian had been correct, but my gut feeling was saying otherwise. So, I walked the last few steps toward the thin door that was creating a barrier between us and leaned against the lockers as I waited for her. She was going to have to come out sometime.

A few minutes later, she did reappear--only after I started wondering if there maybe was a window she could have climbed out. I immediately pushed myself upright as she acted like I wasn't there and started walking in the other direction. But she wasn't going to get away from me that easily.

"Mickey!" I called out and took a few fast strides so I could grab her wrist and stop her from moving.

As I did that, she was forced to turn around. She tried to put on a menacing scowl, but I could see right through it. Although her makeup wasn't smudged, her eyes and surrounding skin showed that she had been crying. I had seen the exact same puffiness when we were at the hospital. Something really wasn't ok.

"What do you want?" She seethed and squinted her eyes at me as she yanked her arm out of my grip.

"I just want to check if you're alright," I said, knowing it probably wasn't the best way of asking her right after the words had left my mouth.

"Just peachy. Now, fuck off." She stormed off again.

"You know I can't do that," I ran after her, not caring where exactly she was leading me, "especially if you're in a state like this."

She froze in her steps and looked at me again, but she didn't show any signs of telling what was going on. Actually, it looked like I had infuriated her even more. "State like this? State like what, Alex?! Are you trying to say that--"

"You can keep trying to push me away, but you know I'm stubborn as fuck," I cut her off, not wanting to wait for her to finish her sentence and leave me again. "I know that you're not ok right now. I can tell from the way you act and look."

She closed her eyes and took a deep breath. For a second, it almost looked like she was going to take a second and then spill her guts. But it was already too good to be true. She shook her head and took off again. I didn't let her go further than one step, though.

"Leave me alone, Alex," she tried to growl, but her voice was too shaky. She couldn't even try to play it off anymore. I had managed to make her break before she got to her destination. I knew, and there was nothing she could do about it.

"No, Mickey. You're obviously not doing ok and I won't let you go through that alone. You can tell me anything, and I'll be here to listen. You might not think I'm the best person for this, but I'll at least try my best. But for me to do that, you actually need to let me in, you need to tell me what's going on."

She stood there in silence again, her body completely stiff. This time, however, I could see the battle going on in her mind. On one hand, she was still standing here with me, on the other she hadn't said anything yet and her body kept moving back and forth a little suggesting she was thinking of running away. Of course, I just hoped that the part of her that was thinking of telling me was going to win.

"IthinkImaybepregnant," she blurted out, her words strung together to make it sound like a jumbled up word.

My eyes went wide, and not just because of the information I was given, but the fact that she was actually telling me without putting up a further fight. I just wanted to take a minute and take it all in, but I wasn't going to risk her sarcastically saying something along the lines of 'well, great advice, Alex. So happy to have told you, Alex. I totally feel better now, Alex.' I needed to act fast.

Only, I didn't exactly act in the best way possible. My stupid questions were arising again. "H-- have you taken a test?"

"I just told you that I think I may be. Does it sound like I did?" She snorted, giving me the exact reaction I was trying to avoid.

But the next thing that came out of my mouth was even worse. "Could it be mine?"

"No, you asshat. Surprisingly, it can only be Devon's. He's the only one I've had sex with since my last... yeah..."

"Ok," I took a deep breath in and calmed down my thoughts, "I'm sorry. I'm just a little shocked right now."

"Yeah, well, you're the one to talk." She rolled her eyes and crossed her arms over her chest.

"Look, Mickey, I get that you're afraid, but you don't have to take it out on me. Hell, I'm even scared for you," I tried to sympathize with her, but I was only a 17-year-old male. How the hell was I supposed to do that?

"Well, that doesn't make me feel better at all. You know what? I shouldn't have told you," she mumbled and slowly started walking away.

But having her leave me on this note only made me feel guilty. I had taken her defense down only to make her feel worse. That wasn't my intention at all.

"No... this is just the first time I've had to deal with something like this. I'm just trying to figure out what to do," I replied whole-heartedly. "I'm going to help you through this. I just need to-- Do you want to tell Devon?" I asked and she shook her head, which actually made me feel a little relieved. I couldn't imagine that guy raising a child. "Ok, well, then, I'll step up. We can act like we've been secretly seeing each other, even if it's only for sex, just like you told Devon. Then, when people find out you're pregnant, they'll think it's mine. I might only be nearly eighteen and way too young, but I'll tell my parents that it's mine and that I want to take responsibility for it. I'll raise it as my own."

"Do you really think that will work?" She inquired. I thought it was a serious question, that she was actually trying to help me with my unrealistic plan, but I soon found out that it wasn't like that at all.

"Yeah," I nodded, still trying to figure it all out in my head. "I mean, I'll probably have to leave behind the whole band thing, which would suck. And I'd have to find a job or maybe find a college that would want me, but we can make it work."

"Are you fucking out of your mind!" She laughed loudly, right into my face. "That's the stupidest plan I've ever heard, and I've heard some stoned guy try and explain how he'd steal the Crown Jewels of England with just a paperclip and speedos. Do you really think you are capable of raising a child? How stupid are you! Alex, I don't even want to be your friend, what in the world makes you think I want you to be the father of my child?!"

"What?" I meekly whispered out.

"Oh my god, you are fucking hilarious. Oh, boy..." She wiped a tear from her eye and continued to laugh as she walked down the hallway.

I was left standing there, shocked and with a broken heart.

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