the guys

ex pt. 2 | him and our break

as i already mention before, we decided to break for a whill because i really felt bored at that time.

i have a bestfriend squad, i have five of my friends in it. two of them was a guy and i was -of course- really close to them.

we're not in the same squad if we weren't that close. duh. it's not like i've been forever with them, but yea i've been really close to them for a long time. such a long time.

longer than my relationship with blue. like- i've been close to those two guys before i was even know that blue is liking me.

and guess what? blue is really jealous with him.

i know. i'm trying to understand. seeing your girlfriend with some other guy is really suck and horrible.

but geez. they were my friends. my squad.

like- you just need to know your portion at that time because i was felt horrible whenever i need to take a break from my besties just for blue.

and being terrible if i was being so close with the guys just because know that blue not gonna like it.

he like it whenever i'm being jealous. we never being in a big fight kinda thing if it was about i am being jealousy. he likes it. so far i think that for him, my jealousy thing is an act from my feeling that i love him so i don't wanna him with the other girl.

and so he is being freaking jealousy to me. if it was an act that 'i love you, i don't wanna you be with everyone else' then it was wroooong.

i just realize that i don't like it. i don't like if he was over protective. or being too jealousy. like- chill bro. i'm not going anywhere.

maybe he thinks that i'm just like the other girls; who thinks that a guy that over protective, or being too jealousy is such a boyfriend material. but i'm not. i'm sick of it.

i was also thinking that because we are one that close anymore since we are in the 9th grade and was on a different class, we are not intimate or close anymore. you know what i mean.

i already tell him that i felt really bored with this relationship. and he said which i gave him that suggestion, that we're gonna make it work.

we're gonna make it work. we really sure about that at that time.

we're not broken, just bend. and we can learn to love again. - give me a reason, P!NK.

but we were wrong. or, at least i was wrong. i couldn't make it work anymore. i'm enough, that's enough.

i just think that- i'm enough. being 1 year and 6 months with him is really enough for us.

but i'm afraid that feeling was temporary. you know, i'm afraid if the next day i was regret it. so i decide to just being break at that time with him.

also we have a national exam not long from when i decided to break, so i have another reason. such a strong and bored reason.

and yeah, we are break.

it's been like- 1 year and a half that i've been break with him. it's just for a while; i thought.

my plan was; when the last day of national exam, i'm gonna talk about how our relationsip go with blue. i know i'm just break his heart and it's not that hard for me to be back again because my heart is more ready for blue.

but he seems nice.

with out me.

i was just- don't wanna going back anymore. i don't wanna him to think that i'm just going back after all this things.

he was nice being without me, and that was enough to tell me that i can go and move on while he is already do that.