Please Come Back To Me

Gone Forever

Please come back to me.

She was just so young. I never even got to tell her that I loved her. Not the cruddy “I love you” before you leave for a small trip to the store. What I mean is the real “I love you”. The “I love you” you say when she looks so happy, or every second that she is with me. I loved her so much. She had no idea how much I loved her. We grew up together; all of those good and bad childhood memories. Seeing that delicate and rare smile of hers just makes me feel warm. It’s almost as if she brightens the whole world with that little dose of happiness. I miss her so much.

My sister was so delicate. She has had so many difficulties with life. She never really seemed happy. Of course she could fake it; anyone can. I just wish that I could have made her truly happy before she left. She was so little when that car crash happened. She made it that time of course, but the second one just was too fatal. The first one was almost like a little fender bender, but she didn’t understand how important seat belts were. She broke her jaw in that little crash. She lost so much blood. I was too young to understand that she almost left us at the age of eight. 

In between crashes was better, yet different. We watched over her more carefully. By “we” I mean my family. We also managed a really strong bond. My sister and I seemed so close in our younger years. As we grew older, our bond was smaller. She found the love of her life, and I was just left behind. I know she didn’t mean to do that, but it’s okay. She was happy, and so was I. She was strong, too. She could face anything. No matter how many heartbreaks and crossroads there were, she seemed to just push through. I respected her so much. I loved her so much.

The second crash was harsh. She wasn’t killed on impact, so the paramedics brought her to the ER.

I saw her die.

I saw that last breath suck into her lungs. I saw her heartbeat stop. I saw the tears before I even felt them. 

Gone

She was gone forever.