Please Don't Eat Me

Chapter 3

The next morning, Di Xiaoshu lay on his side on his bed, watching and waiting for his alarm to ring.

He didn’t get a wink of sleep. He touched the dark circles under his eyes and heaved a sigh.

He thought about a lot last night. Maybe I should tell Dad and Mom that I love them. Maybe I should confess to my crush in university. Maybe I should seriously thank all the people who’ve helped me…. In the end, he got nowhere.

So he decided with his drowsy mind that morning to head to work first and worry about the rest later.

He had made it through the night already anyway.

Di Xiaoshu cautiously peeked out the peephole before leaving.

All clear. Yes! > <

He had just opened the door and gotten ready to sprint out of the complex when he tripped on a basket in front of the door.

What’s this? It only took him a moment before recognizing it as the basket he had dropped in front of the neighbour’s door.

The cookies inside were all gone but, instead, there was a note.

“The cookies were delicious. Thank you.”

The cookies were delicious so…that means I’m next, doesn’t it? QAQ
Di Xiaoshu went to work with his head hanging low.

However, things didn’t turn out exactly the way he had thought it would.

Mr. Lausenschlange didn’t gobble him up right away but instead—rather than calling it “being friends”—Di Xiaoshu felt he was being ordered around like a servant more than anything.

Soon after the note, Mr. Lausenschlange came a-knocking.

Di Xiaoshu had to open up with the Man Upstairs at his door. Despite breaking out in cold sweat just from peeping through the peephole, he could only brace himself and open the door.

In all honesty, Di Xiaoshu had already written out his will and stuffed it under his pillow, yet Mr. Lausenschlange came for…more cookies?

“Coo-cookies?”

“Yeah, cookies. Could you?” Mr. Lausenschlange smiled politely and looked a bit…shy?!?!

What happened to that stony-faced man I saw the other day???

“Y-y-y-you don’t wanna eat me? Ah, I-I mean…you wanna eat my cookies?”

“Uh-huh.”

“I-I don’t have any here…but if I make them now…I’ll get them to you in the afternoon…is that okay?” Di Xiaoshu looked at him with puppy eyes.

“I’ll be waiting then!”

And that is how Di Xiaoshu began his career as a manual labourer, with Mr. Lausenschlange asking for food every other day.

Then they started to chat about other topics asides from cookies. For example, Di Xiaoshu found out that Mr. Lausenschlange’s name was Ling She and that he worked for an investment bank and only recently got transferred to headquarters here.
Needless to say, it was all small talk in the halls or elevator, nothing particularly serious, and the most crucial topic—their identity as demons—had never been brought to the table despite both of them knowing very well.

As a result, Di Xiaoshu never once felt at ease despite getting by unscathed for a few weeks.

Every time he saw Ling She lick his lips or lift his hand, he would recoil out of instinct, as if he was going to be eaten any minute.

And thinking back to the playful expression on Ling She’s face every time he saw him made Di Xiaoshu furious but terrified at the same time.

Many Lausenschlange liked to play with their prey.

You could even say that they didn’t enjoy the hunt, but the act of waiting for the right moment to poison or injure their prey, and then leisurely trailing behind them as they dragged their paralyzed bodies to their own deaths.

Di Xiaoshu felt he must have fallen into Ling She’s long-term plan of toying with his prey. 😭

Thinking back to the curvature of Ling She’s arms that one time he folded up his shirt sleeves, Di Xiaoshu felt that he had zero hope of escaping.

He had signed a one-year contract for the house and the fine was very high. It was too late to find another place now.

He didn’t want to ask for help from friends or family because most of them were also Mauzhertz.

If they got involved….

So he could only compliantly fulfill Ling She’s requests and live without knowing if there would be another tomorrow.