Mr. Elbert Charles Buys a Car

Mr. Elbert Charles Buys a Car

Today, Mr. Elbert Charles was very excited. Today, he was going to buy a brand new car!

Mr. Elbert Charles imagined all kinds of cars that he could buy.

Maybe a fast, red car with two doors. Or a big, blue truck that could carry heavy things like elephants. What if he got a shiny, black limousine instead? That would look great with his shiny, black sunglasses.

As Mr. Elbert Charles took the bus to the car lot, he began imagining himself driving down country roads, highways, and downtown streets.

The bus finally arrived at the car lot. Mr. Elbert Charles eagerly climbed out of his seat and down the steps of the bus.

Straight ahead, Mr. Elbert Charles saw a huge, worn sign that said "Haney's Heaps".

"What an encouraging sign," Mr. Elbert Charles thought.

Suddenly a man appeared. "Howdy! I'm Mr. Haney! Welcome to Haney's Heaps!"

He was a round man with a frumpy purple suit, a nice tan hat, and a very big smile.

"Why hello, Mr. Haney. My name is Mr. Elbert Charles. I'm here to buy a car," Mr. Elbert Charles explained.

"My favorite thing to do is sell cars! And make omelets, but that's besides the point," Mr. Haney answered. "Would you like a purple minivan? Or a mustard yellow moving truck? Maybe a magenta ice cream truck?" Mr. Haney continued.

"Well," Mr. Elbert Charles said hesitantly, "I was thinking about buying a more practical car."

"Practical? We have tons of practical cars!" Mr. Haney said excitedly. He began walking away quickly then turned around. "What does practical mean?"

"Practical means something is effective in helping one achieve one's goal without being inconvientant" Mr. Elbert Charles explained. He loved memorizing words and their definitions from dictionaries. Why just the other day he learned the word "epanalepsis" which is the repetition of the same word at the beginning and end of the sentence, why.

"Oh yes! I knew that" Mr. Haney said, walking quickly again. "What did you have in mind?"

"Maybe a shiny, black limo. It'll match my sunglasses" Mr. Elbert Charles said thinking his answer was practical for fashion.

"Sorry, we only have a rusty, orange limo that is missing a tire" Mr. Haney said, pointing to the limo section that held the only limo on the lot.

"Okay, what about a big, blue turck? One that could move heavy things, like 2,000 pizzas?" Mr. Elbert Charles asked, believing his request was practical for moving heavy things.

"Hmmm, well we have a big, pink truck, but the weight limit is only 1,500 pounds. That means it could only hold less than half of the amount of pizzas you want it to hold" Mr. Haney explained. "But it could hold a nice group of band members with light weight instruments."

"Rats! What about a fast, red car with two doors? Then I can get everywhere faster" Mr. Elbert Charles said, trusting his plan was practical for getting places on time and quickly.

"Oh! We have that, except it's a fast, lime green car that's missing two doors" Mr. Haney answered excitedly.

"What if I fall out?" Mr. Elbert Charles asked with a worried glance towards the car.

"That's why you wear your seatbelt" Mr. Haney explained. "Granted the seatbelts come unbuckled if you hit a bump on the road" he said almost to himself.