The Fault In Our Stars Epilogue

Epilogue -One Shot

Augustus rewrote his will as he met Hazel Grace. He left everything to her, including the countless sweatshirts she had worn off and never returned. He didn't write his preferred place of burial, though, until he got off the plane.

Augustus wanted to be buried in Amsterdam.

Hazel didn't even mind taking the endless flights to see him, she was so accustomed to going now. This time, this time was different, though. She didn't know how, but something was going to change.

As she stepped up to the cemetery gate, she gazed through the iron bars. Gus' grave was in the middle of the cemetery, shrouded by an out-of-place willow tree. Hazel had picked that spot. It was unique and beautiful, Augustus would say it was just like her. She walked through the gates and through the middle of the lines of tombstones. She stopped at Peter Van Houten's grave and placed a single flower from her bouquet on the patch of grass in front of his stone.

Van Houten had died shortly after Augustus. Cause of death: alcoholism. It was inevitable.

"Rest in peace, you bastard," she whispered, before carrying on to the willow tree. She carefully stayed directly in the middle of the lines of graves as to not step on the toes of the dead. She knew it was ridiculous, but sometimes it's necessary to be a little light hearted.
When she reached the tree she knelt in front of the stone. It was black granite, the words written in gold flake.
"AUGUSTUS WATERS
FRIEND, SON, BOYFRIEND.
TAKEN FROM US JULY 2, 2009"

Hazel sat next to the stone, leaning on the side of it. She traced his name until her fingers were tired, and then she reached into her pocket. When she pulled her hand out she held a teal pack of Magic Rabbit cigarettes, she placed them, and what remained of her bouquet of orange tulips, on his grave. A tear escaped from her eye, and she let it fall.

For the first few months she wouldn't let herself cry. She wouldn't feel sorry for herself and she couldn't open up to anyone. It was when she read Gus' will that she knew she was all wrong. He had left her a notebook, full of things she could do. There was always one page she came back to. It said,
"You can move on. You can cry and feel sorry for yourself and hold me responsible, because I know you love me Hazel Grace. You can move on from me if you want to, find someone new. Actually, scratch that. You can do that if you'd like, but I know you Hazel, you'll keep visiting my grave and telling me about your life, and I'll always be listening. I'll always be loving you."

So now Hazel sat at his grave, and she cried. And she cried until it got dark, and only the stars illuminated the tears on her face. And she laid down beside the stone, her head in the grass, and she sang.

'It's just another night, and I'm staring at the moon.
I saw a shooting star and thought of you.
I sang a lullaby, by the water side
I knew,
If you were here I'd sing to you.'

'You're on the other side, as the skyline splits in two
Miles away from seeing you.
So can you see the stars, over Amsterdam?
Hear the song my heart is beating to...'

'So open your eyes, and see.
The way or horizons meet.
And all of the lights will lead
Into the night with me.

And I know these scars will bleed
But both of our hearts believe
That all of the stars will guide us home."

And as she finished her song she knew she would see Augustus again soon, sooner than she had originally thought. She kissed her fingers and placed them on the stone, and then prepared to leave the cemetery.

She jumped into the first cab she saw. "Where to miss?" the driver asked.

"The nearest walking bridge, please. I need some fresh air." So the cabbie put the taxi in gear and they were off. They drove for about five minutes before Hazel saw a high bridge looming out over the river and she told the cabbie to stop. She paid her fair and stepped out of the cab and onto the bridge.
It was misty and a little too cold to be going for a walk, but Hazel didn't mind it. It got her where she was going. As she reached the middle of the bridge she peered over the edge, he water looked frigid and extremely uninviting. Guess she'd just have to invite herself.

"Gus, if you can hear me, I know you'll be mad, but you can't stay mad at me forever. You probably wouldn't want this, but I know for sure that I do. I know that I need this more than anything. Besides," Hazel swallowed back tears,

"Your book didn't say anything about jumping off bridges."