Story time with Ayu

University

Disclaimer: What I am telling in my "Story time with Ayu" is just my personal experience and oppinion. I do not intend to harm or put anyone in a bad light.

1. How is uni going?
Well...atm its not going anywhere because I have summer break. But as to how was my first year, well it was a bumpy ride. It was hard for me because it was the first year and I am kinda forced to do it, whitout really wanting it.

2. Why did u go to uni then?
Well, You have been on this journy since the start and probs know that this job just fell into my lap. Well in order to actually become an official teacher I need to get my uni diploma, so I just jumped into uni. Tho to explain why it is still kinda useless for me. Well ima be a german teacher, almost exklusivly teaching german, and the uni I do is completly in romanian. Do you see the issue? It wont really help me a lot for my job. Ofc it helps bc I get to learn how to do some paper stuff, but thats allmost all. It does not help me become a good teacher or get my language skills up or anything, so yeah.

3. Is there anything atm that bothers you?
Besides the fact that I still consider it useless? Yes..a lot of things bother me. Ik uni and school isn't useless and it's good to have as many diplomas as you can have, but again it does not teach you how to become a better human nor how to handle some things in regards to socializing. And tbh a good teacher, in my eyes, is someone who you can consider as ur "friend". Someone who is still good at teaching but also a kind hearted human beeing and who understands that sometimes you dont get things right away, or that you have a hard time in ur life and just couldn't learn or do your homework and so on. Someone who listens to the studens and tries to help them. But mostly, someone who does not think they are superior to the srudent. Even if you are the teacher, you are not god. Each day you learn new things and sometimes even studens can teach the teacher new interesting things.
And tbh, I do not think that you can learn this in university, and yet again I am a german teacher..yet I do university in romanian.

Also..I hate it that in my case at uni, I learn things that have nothing to do with first graders.
Let me explain it like this, bc if I would actually say it in romanian literature, plenty of u will have no clue about what I talk.

So..from 1 to 4th grade in school, you learn normal basic shit, like childs literature, how to write and talk properly, basic math and so on...right?
Well, why tf do I then learn shit like Shakespeare in university? What good does it do me? Ok..I get it, we need to learn shits like those bc we are "adults" and need to know it. But I did learn it in high school, so why again?
I see university as learning to improve your skils in the chosen domani, right? So why do I need to write 3000 pages about Romeo and Juliet if I am going to end up teaching kids the alphabet and how much 1+1 is. And same with math, why do I need to know what f(x) is, if all I am gonna teach is basic 10y/o shit?
Like, don't get me wrong, I get the idea behind it. But isn't it more important to know kids stories and how to teach a kid, than to know adult literature and how to fing x's girlfriend in math? Ikd...just my point of view, but not only. I talked to my old math teacher, great teacher and a better woman (even tho many hate her cuz shes the kind of person thats straight to your face) and she sees it the same as me. Universitis should focus more on teaching you how to teach kids instead of on only learning high end stuff.

In this one year I didn't learn anything from uni as to how to be a good teacher or so. All I learned was adults literature, finding x's girlfriend in math and a whole lot of psichology. All I know about how to handle a kid is from my mother and my other coworker teachers. And I find it so sad bc nowdays it's so hard as a young woman to gain ur kids trust and respect. If u do not know how to handle them, they learn how to handle you and then ull end up having a class with 20 kids who never listen to you and do not learn at all.

This is just my biggest "problem" whit uni, bc I have a lot of them. Its just so fake here and everyone is just for their own. Most would not even give you a nail of help if u asked for it.
We have a groupchat on facebook bc we are over 100 girls from all over the place and its just way easyer to get informations like that, right? Well...let me tell you otherwise....

4. Did you make new friends?
Well I meet a girl out of coincidence that is from the same town as me. One day I booked a ride to uni, but they forgot to pick me up so I rushed to the train. It was the first time I was supposed to travel with the  train in years. Literally almost 10 years since I last got on a train. So yeah, I was lost and scared and was just there in the train station when I heared someone talk about the same city. So I got all my courage and walked to that girl and asked her wich train it is, and so we found out that we are actually collegues and we became friends.

Shes really nice and all, but shes a lil younger than me, and so whenever there was smthing I asked ppl (mostly) bc she was shy. And guess what...no one of the 100 girls in my class ever replied to me and its not like they didnt see or so. They just left me on seen. And whats funny? They allways allmost imediatly replied to my friend. And like I get it, I have tatoos and the piercing and my crazy ass hair and I often do not really look friendly, but srsly, is it so hard to reply if I ask in which class we have that day or so? Like ffs, you dont know me at all and maybe if ud know me, u would not like me, but still, why do you act like I dont exist. And this kept on going till like spring, almost 6 months. And srsly, the only explenation I can give myself for this acting is that I am different. I look different than most of my collegues and also am.

Most of them have a normal life, family, boyfriend/husband and even kids. While I am a child that is extremely awkward and does not like the normal stuff such as family and so on. Im al about growing as your own and finding yourself and doing the things you like and want without sociaty telling you "no you dont do that bc u need a hubby and kids".  Like pls, for the love of god, dont take me wrong on it, I have nothing against ppl who think diferently and who are happy with what they chose to do. To each their own! But I hate it when I am forced to do what others do. I am my own person and u have no right to make me feel bad, or anyone else just bc they dont like and want the same things as you. What if I dont want a hubby and actually want a waifu? Or what if I cant have kids? Am I less of a human and woman just bc I think diferently? And I get it if whit what I think and do I would harm others, but I never do. I never force myself and my mentality to anyone. Yes I speak about it and on how I see things. But I never demend anyone to do and thibk the same as I do. You are your own person. The only version of you that exists and others should respect that and so on...

Idk...all this uni tought me till now is on how to be forced to do things that arent me and how to be a fake someone. To be just another puppet on a string.

5. Edited!
So...above I talked about the lack of comunication between me and my other classmates, and it just happend again.
So uni starts like next month or so, idk exactly. And ofc we need to renew our contract. All fine till now.
Well...like a week ago they set the contract renewing on the 15.09.2019 and that was fine. And just today I found out that its actually on the 17.09.2019. Not much of a problem u say? Well..I got a job offer and for me to get it, I have to write an exam and I accepted. Well..the exam is set at the exact day when the uni set the renewing shit. Do you see the issue? Remember, most of us are from other "states" and have jobs and all. So why do you put the contract shits only on one day? Why not two or on a weekend like initially set. Why change things like crazy. Also, why not actually post it officialy somewhere?? I just found out today (11.09.2019) and I confirmed my presence at the exam yesterday. Now what do I do? Do I leave uni for the job or do I lose my job bc uni cant comunicat with its students like they should?

Like srsly. From a workplace and university and anything official, you are expecting to be anounced at a point where you can still be able to set ur own plans. It takes time to get a free day off from work or to change your whole plans, especially when you are from a different state ffs and I know I am not the only one in this situation. I have a lot of other classmates who are in the same situation as me.

So all in all I find uni kinda useless. Ok, I know that you mostly need a higher education, but again, it should focus more on what you chose and make you a master in that speciality than just redoing your highschool. Also why is there such a lack of comunication nowdays. Isn't it so easy to just spread informations now with all the internetplatforms we have? So why is it for my university and classmates so hard to do so?

What is your oppinion about this topic? Do you agree with me or not? I am really curious about it since this  is a serious topic and I would love to see your point of view!