A bunch of hetalia oneshots/ drabbles i guess?

Familial Nordics

"Tell them how you messed up," Matthias said, finally happy that he wasn't the one who caused these types of situations.

"Do I have to? They'll just believe that I'm covering for your ass," Emil reasoned. He knew the utter crap the others would give him for fucking up that badly just like they did to the Danish man beaming annoyingly next to him.

"No they wouldn't because you never would," Matthias shot back.

"Ugh, fuck. Fine," Emil huffed. He marched angrily to the door, wincing along the way, remnant of a three year old. His dirt covered sneakers soon started turning green with grass stains as he tried to get home before Matthias would announce their presence.

Emil slowly started to open the door in an attempt to lessen the creak. He started tiptoeing up the stairs, but unfortunately he made it halfway before his companion yelled.

"We're back! Oh, man do we have a story for y'all." Matthias was oblivious to the nineteen year old's plan of trying to stall for time.

"You guys, how was everything? Man, you guys were gone for a long while and oH MY GOD WHAT HAPPENED?" came the cries of a concerned Finnish man.

"We're fine Tino. Lil' Icey has a story for you guys, after all it is his fault," Matthias smirked. The platinum blond mouthed back an 'I hate you' as he slowly came downstairs, along with his half-brother and his friend.

"You both look like roadkill and where's the car?" Lukas said as he patted his brother on the shoulder, a way to welcome him back.

"Well, what happened was that we were...robbed?" Emil said, unsure if the lie would be enough this time.

"How were we robbed?" Matthias questioned enjoying the fact that the other was squirming.

"At gunpoint," Emil retorted, wanting to throttle the sandy blond when everyone else left. The three let out a collective gasp.

"And how did we get in that situation?" Matthias poked.

"Who knows what goes on in the mind of a criminal?" Emil evaded.

"Oh please, if you won't tell them I will," Matthias threatened.

"Emil, what actually happened you guys?" Tino asked. The tone in his voice dared Emil to lie.

"Okay, fine. We were doing the delivery when this guy on the freeway cut us off. I decided to follow him when he realizes. He got out of his car. I got out of the van and he asks if I'm a cop. I said not but still called him an asshole for cutting me off. He said that that wasn't his question. I asked him what's it to him if I am. He says he'll give me one more chance. I said he could take his chance and shove it up his ass, and to not be a dick and cut people off. He calls me a little shit. I said at least mine has a size, and then he and a group of his buddies beat me up, started to open their trunk and pull out individual bricks of drugs.When they open the back to transport them, they see that lug over there sleeping. They toss him out and drove off with everything. We had to hitchhike back here and when we told the guy in a pickup the story he accused us of being addicts and kicked us out, so we walked the rest of the way. And, yeah," Emil said looking at the floor embarrassed by what happened.

"I can't believe I was right," His brother said. "I knew your mouth was going to get you in trouble one day but this? This is fucking gold right here."

"Shut up, dickwad," Emil said as his brother was laughing along with Tino, who was turning red.

"That's it, I'm going upstairs. Don't call me for anything except food," Emil left the others down there as they wouldn't stop laughing, knowing that he would never hear the end of it.