Best night ever

Best couple

I still hear the crunch of metal echoing non-stop in my ears. The grisly images

hiding in my eyelids, waiting for me to blink. But the most powerful reminder is my classmates chattering like monkeys and laughing over nothing. What do they have to be happy about? Friends are grouped together, and couples cling to each other for dear life. I remember what that was like. The DJ is now bringing the previous song to a stop and the happy couples unglue from each other and smile shyly. I remember that too. "Aalllrigh-ty folks." The principal calls out in an overly peppy tone. "Now it's time to crown prom king and queen!" Oh great, another excuse for privileged little brats to gain more bragging rights. "First of all, our prom court." This is going to take forever. "Best dressed..." At this point I zone out. I hear cheering as the winners are announced for each category and clap along slowly.

"And now for best couple." This is stupid. "Lucas Greene and Allison..." He lets his sentence go unfinished, we all know what he was going to say. The crowd goes silent. Everyone's eyes are glued to me, watching my reactions. I can feel tears spring to my eyes. They called me, me and...her. You can now hear hushed whispers spread through the crowd and the principal stammer "I'm so sorry. You don't have to..." But I don't let him finish, I'm out the door and into the dark parking lot of the high school. There are tears flowing freely from my eyes and I don't bother to stop them. After sitting on the curb for what feels like both a minute and an eternity, I feel a hand on my shoulder. "Hey Luke, you okay?" It's my old friend Faith. I glance up at her, blurry through tears. She was wearing the prom queen tiara. Faith is one of the sweetest people I know, but she can't help me. No one can but Allison. But she's not here.

It was only one month before today. Actually it was 3 weeks, 4 days, about 14 and a half hours. We were together that day. I was the last thing she saw. We were coming home from the cemetery of all places. Allison loved ghost and monsters and things like that. But we were driving home, laughing and chatting. God I miss her laugh. But we couldn't process the danger before it hit us. Quite literally. A drunk driver was hit us from the side, I was too distracted by her to notice. God how I love her, loved. I catch myself doing this all the time. What's worst is when I first wake up. I forget that she's dead, I wake up with a smile, and then the realization hits me like a brick dropped on my head. Alli lived only across the street from me. I have to pass her home everyday on my way to school and on the way back. Every time I look out my window I expect to see her. But I see nothing but the occasional, understanding smile from her mom, who's probably the only person to grieve at the same level, if not less, than me.

I would have forgotten that Faith was here except I could feel her fiddling with the lapel of my jacket. "What are you doing?" Then I noticed the red out of the corner of my eye. 'Best couple' said the ribbon. "You earned it." She explained with a sad smile. And then she tucked the matching ribbon into my suit pocket. "You shouldn't have come today. We love having you with us." And by we she means our small group of friends, but I can't stand most of them "But it's too soon. Your still too early in the healing process for the wound to be reopened like this." Normally I would hate to be babied like this. But Faith's caring and sincere nature makes me stand up, and engulf her in a hug. "Thanks Fay." I say, using her nickname from our childhood. "Of course Luke. I just hate seeing you cry." With that she wipes a tear from my cheek and forms a few tears of her own. "Go have fun. I'm sure your king is waiting for you." With a small smile and a kiss to my cheek (which I'm sure left a print of fuchsia), she waltzed back inside.

I had many other people check up on me. The last person I could stand to talk to was my friend Todd. He offered me a ride home, but it was evident in his slurred speech that he'd had more than a few cups of the spiked punch. So I turned that offer down. I wanted to walk , well I had to walk considering my car is totaled. Besides, there's a stop I wanted to make. I left the parking lot and walked in the direction opposite my house. With each step on the short trek, a new memory of our time together floats into my head. Happy memories, because that's all we had. That's why we won the ribbon. I reach my destination at last. "we won, again" I whisper. "Your smile would have been huge." A teardrop falls onto the headstone. I can barley hold back a sob. "I miss you so much." I run my fingers over the stiff material of the ribbon lying on the top of her grave. I sit down across from the stone and wipe my eyes. I read the words engraved in the stone. I stare at them, almost as if expecting them to disappear, along with the events of last month. "I've known you longer than anyone else. Who would have thought I'd lose you." I let out a humorless chuck and drop my head.

"They gave me depression meds ya know." I pull the pills out of my pants pocket. I've never even opened the small orange bottle. "Remember when we were little, your mom left her painkillers out on the counter? And you ate a palmful, thinking it was candy. Do you remember the hospital bed? Because I remember lying next to you when you woke up." I've avoided them thus far for that reason only. I remember walking into the hospital, an oblivious child, thinking my friend was just sleeping. I remember rolling into an ambulance, praying that my love was only sleeping.

I try to close my eyes, but the memories are still there. Her laugh, her snapped neck, her being dragged away from the car. But most of all, I remember being wheeled away, screaming for her. I watched her get lifted up, and then the doors shut out my view of her. I couldn't take anymore memories right now. I tighten my grip on the pills,Xanax, I've heard of it. And I know the consequences of taking too many. But I couldn't find a reason not to. So I take the bottle and tip a dozen or so into my mouth, swallowing them one at a time. How is this whole death thing supposed to work? Will it hurt?

I'll know in the morning, if I wake up, that I'm meant to live until a natural death. All of my questions will be answered, I'll throw away the pills, and go to whatever counseling is advised. If I die, let it be so. I'm not happy here anyways. There is no 'Happily ever after' without Alli. So I'll just let my tale close with a simple, the end.