Merrie Melodies: Bugs Goes Big

Tonight was a very big night for the Looney Tunes. The Annual Toontime Emmys Ceremony would be held tonight. It's one of the most prestigious events in the Toon industry, with many big stars gracing the red carpet with their presence. The awards show was already underway, with many of the awards having been presented to their winners.

The next category, and one of the most important, was Best Male Toon in a toon, toon, or toon. Naturally, the ever-so-humble Bugs Bunny was there that night, having been nominated. When asked about the award on the red carpet, he only wished the other nominees the best of luck and genuinely hoped that it went to the best man without ever professing his own hope to win.

Accompanying him to the show was his plus-one and fellow prominent Toon star, the self-absorbed and narcissistic Daffy Duck. He had naturally assumed that his nomination letter got lost in the mail and was fully convinced that he was part of the nominees for the evening; he completely expected a "surprise announcement when the envelope was opened, saying that Daffy Duck was the winner". He would force himself on camera at the red carpet telling uninterested newscasters how much he deserved the award.

The two of them sat down at the same table, Daffy forcing his colleagues to interact with him as he ate noisily and greedily.

After the last award was presented, the show cut to commercial, leaving Bugs and Daffy to talk for a bit before they were back on the air.

"Hey Daffy," Bugs began. "Sorry that you weren't nominated this year."

"Don't be silly," Daffy professed. "They always save the best nominee for last. Have I not told you about the surprise nominee that they're sure to announce when they present the award?"

"Yeah. You have. Several times. But listen, I was able to pull some strings and make you the presenter for the next award, so at least you're on TV saying stuff."

"Trying to pander to the lessers, I see! Well, since you haven't yet realized that I've placed myself on a much higher pedestal than you, maybe my winning the Best Male Toon award will help you see the error of your ways!"

Bugs stared at him flatly. "No, I can see you definitely put yourself on a high pedestal, bucko. Anyway, I think they're calling your name."

Daffy jumped out of seat and began fixing his bowtie. "Aha! You bet they are! Now if you'll excuse me, I've got a Toontime Emmy to present to myself! Rather fitting that they choose the best man to give an award to the best man, don't you think?"

"Whatever helps you sleep at night, Daff."

Daffy strutted towards backstage, waiting for his name to be called. Soon enough, the commercials ended and Daffy puffed out his chest.

"Ladies and gentlemen," an announcer called. "Daffy Duck."

Being greeted with applause, Daffy made a prideful stroll to the microphone.

"Please please," Daffy with fake humility said into the mic. "Hold your applause until I win my award."

This extremely inconsiderate self-introduction was greeted with confused and disgruntled murmurs of "What did he say?" and "What a jerk" as well as Bugs slapping his own forehead.

Daffy cleared his throat and looked towards the teleprompter, which read "Our next category is for the Best Male Toon in a toon, toon, or toon. Here are the nominees."

When Daffy was finally ready to speak, he said "Our next category is for the Best Male Toon in a toon, toon, or toon. This award represents some of the finest work done in Toondom that could only be performed by a high-caliber, sophisticated, and frankly...unparalleled individual of talent."