Never Gone (One Direction x Reader)

Chapter 2

-Through The Dark-

My previous aching legs mean nothing in comparison to my now aching heart and mind. I deeply wish I had googled what artists were performing to mentally prepare myself. After Jonathon had announced that Louis Tomlinson was our two-night performer for the week, I had to ask to visit the bathroom before doing anything else. Not only do I desperately need a nervous-pee break, but also because I need a private space to freak out right now.

Okay. Okay. I'm fine. I have to act professional about this. I begin rubbing my hands together anxiously. What am I doing? The shaking? The sudden nerves? I thought I got over all this? I guess some things never can change. No way would I be able to show how insane or excited I am... just have to be cool, calm and collected. Yep, that's it. Be like everyone else you've met here. Pretend like everything is fine... because everything is, in fact, perfectly fine.

I hear a distinct knock on the bathroom door. It's one of the crew members, Abby I think it was?
"Y/N? Mick told me to come and get you. Our first performer has arrived and we need to show you the sound check." She calls out.

Everything is, in fact, not perfectly fine.

Following a few deep breaths, I reluctantly exit the bathroom and follow the crew member up into the Sound Box at the top of the theatre. Buttons of all variations and tiny screens show information of no meaning to me. Distracted by all the blinking lights and colourful icons, I pay no attention to the all too familiar idol walking on stage.
"Alright Louis, just sing a few bars of your opening section and we'll go from there." My friendly tech teacher, Abby, advises by speaking into a thin microphone poking out from the sound board.
"Will do." Louis responds simply into his microphone. Slowly pacing up and down the stage, Louis does as he's instructed. All I manage to do is to stare in absolute awe and disbelief. My instincts want me to cheer and woop like the giddy and overwhelmed admirer I am, but I know I must restrain myself.
"That's great, Louis. Standby. Guitarist?" Abby instructs. I let out a breath I hadn't realised I was holding as Louis finished. Even for the brief moment I heard Louis's voice, I felt my age drop 4 years.

This whole experience just seems so surreal. Watching the Louis Tomlinson stand up on stage, not a single audience member in the crowd. No roaring fans, no background instruments blazing in the background meshing perfectly with the vocals, no 3 or 4 friends beside him. Just him, dressed in a dark hoodie and track-pants, on a wide stage staring out into the dark abyss and blinding spotlight. We always get to see the flashy and chaotic part of production that goes on stage during showtime. Yet, this however somehow seems more genuine? Just the musician and their music, only the basics and necessities of a singer, no fancy lighting or glamorous background. Those luxurious props are only secondary to a performer, all that a performer needs is themselves and their work. The artist singing whole-heartedly into the darkness of a room as their sound swirls through the air and into the ears of anyone lucky enough to be nearby. Woah, I guess I'm having a Jerzy Grotowski kind of perspective right now.

I'm lost in observing the raw atmosphere, until Abby repeats my name for allegedly the third time.
"Oh, Uh. I'm sorry what did you say?" I flinch.
"Do you mind pushing those up by two notches, for mic 5 and 4?" She calmly says gesturing towards the soundboard. Following her finger, I do as she instructs. It's going to be a long day now that Tommo has seemed to have stolen my focus.

{...}

"Y/N! Come hold these for a sec!" Mick calls out from across the echoey room.
"Be right there!" I respond while handing two beverages to two crew members that asked the favour of me. Sometimes there is simply no escaping the coffee making.
"Here, hold tight." Mick advises as he begins stacking papers upon papers in my arms.
"What are all of these?" I question.
"A variety of things. Song lists, sound que's, next week performance scripts. I'm just trying to clear up all the clutter in this corner so we can have more space for a stage piece next week. That reminds me, I need to call what time they're gonna drop those pieces off on Thursday." Mick finishes unloading the documents in my hands and begins patting around his trousers for his phone.
"Ohhhh, good God. Where's my phone?" He mumbles to himself. "Y/N, do you mind grabbing my phone for me, I think I left in room K111? Left stage door, underneath the stage. Drop the documents off at K108 on your way. And when you come back just get me a Large coffee cup of espresso."
"H-How much shots of espresso are in a large coffee cup?" I question slightly concerned.
"Quadruple, quintuple, however much, It's what I need right now." Mick groans while pinching the bridge of his nose.
"K108, K111 and large espresso. Got it." I repeat as I turn on my heel to follow his instructions.