Speak

Chapter 17

"That which we call a rose, by any other name would smell as sweet." 

~ William Shakespeare

Despite the new medication Doc gave me, I still can't get HIM out of my head. It seems that no matter where I go, there is no escape from my demented mind.

On Monday, on my way to my literature class, I see HIM standing near the entrance to the building. On Tuesday, HE walks into the coffee shop while I'm having lunch with Wes. On Wednesday, I'm looking in the library for reference books for psychology, and HE's there in the aisle across from me. On Thursday, HE's talking to Ethan and Liam in the quad. HE even appears when I go out to eat with Wes, James, and his girlfriend on Friday.

Everywhere I turn, it seems HE's there, and every time, I repeat the same process: take more pills, then try to wash HIS sweat, saliva, and semen away. Maybe if I tell myself enough times that HE isn't real, if I pop enough pills, then perhaps HE will finally disappear from my mind.

I have to make HIM go away because I cannot go back to Shadow Mountain. I'm quite confident I'd already be there if it weren't for Wes. Right now, he's the only thing keeping me sane.

He must be working with Hannah or Greg on methods to help me focus and regain control when I'm in the middle of a panic attack. He'll skip class and stay with me, just to make sure I'm okay. Just to make sure I don't cut myself.

It helps until I see HIM again.

Saturday morning, I get up and take a shower. Even though the charity gala isn't until this evening, Wes is picking me up at ten to go out to his parents' house.

I'm nervous as hell.

Doc is convinced they'll like me, but I'm sure he only said that to make me less apprehensive. Wes's aunt is Carolynn Lockwood, which means he has money, which means they'll probably think I'm just a gold digger. I didn't exactly have a meager upbringing. With my mother as a veterinarian and my father, a retired Army Colonel, we had money. I never needed or wanted for anything. We had a lovely house, but it was nothing compared to Wes.

After I wash my hair twice, because first impressions are everything, I stare at the clothes in my closet. Gone are the days when I wore the latest fashions. Now, I just want to be invisible and comfortable.

What the hell am I supposed to wear?

I can't exactly show up to Wes's parents' house wearing my gala dress. None of my clothes feel appropriate. While I do have a few nicer outfits that Gumby insisted on buying me, I don't want to seem overdressed. I look at the clothes I wear on a daily basis. I think showing up in ripped jeans and flannel would make Wes's mother roll her eyes in disgust.

I am completely dumbfounded and keep sorting through clothes when there's a knock on the door.

I look at the clock and panic.

It's ten, Wes is here, and I'm practically naked.

"Hey, Liz, are you ready," Wes calls from the other side of the door.

Hell no.

I reach for my phone, sitting on my desk and type out a quick text message to Wes.

I literally just got out of the shower, so give me a few.

**Wesley POV**

"Take your time, beautiful," I call through the door after reading Liz's text.