The Hidden Diary of Ophelia Ridley

9

13 June 1988

Dear Diary, 

Things have been rocky since Daniel and I had our row. Usually, he's a bothersome pest, always hanging around demanding affection but he hasn't said a single word to me since the night of the concert. 

I am thrilled. 

My mother is not. 

"I don't know what happened between you two but you will fix things, young lady!" my mother had ordered me while plucking the feathers from one of the ducks dad had shot recently. When I had informed him that hunting was cruel and unnecessary he told me that living with me was cruel and unnecessary. The feeling was mutual. 

"I don't want to fix things." I told her, looking out the window as my father emerged from the stables on his way home. 

"You do if you want to keep your job at the ice cream parlor." She smiled viciously at me. It was a low blow. Of course she had no idea how much I needed the income from my job in order to get the hell out of Norwood but she knew I liked work. Liking anything was dangerous within my family. 

But faced with the threat of unemployment and the prospect of interacting with my father as he approached the house, I figured it wouldn't hurt anything to pay Daniel a visit. 

I left the cabin and walked briskly towards the manor, ignoring my father's inquiries. I let myself in through the kitchen as I had done many times before and took the servants staircase up to Daniel's room where, after knocking I was told to enter. 

"You can put the tea in the-oh. Ophelia." Daniel tensed when he saw me and I felt a tad odd being in the room with him, though we used to do this all the time when we were younger. "What are you doing here?"

"I...haven't heard from you in a few days." I wasn't sure what to say. I didn't miss him, I wasn't sorry, I certainly didn't want to spend time with him. I should have stayed in the cabin.

"You were very upset. You were acting strangely."

"I wasn't acting strangely!" I protested.

"You were singing and dancing on stage."

"I was having fun."

"It wasn't lady-like." 

"When have you ever known me to be ladylike?"

"You've never done that before." 

My eyes narrowed in annoyance, and as I studied Daniel, I realized how uncertain he looked. Before I could ask him why it had bothered him so much, he spoke up. "I don't want to lose you. I miss the old you." 

I instinctively rolled my eyes at how that sounded. The old me was scared of her family, miserable in life, and blissfully ignorant about the state of her parents union. Working at the ice cream shop, going to a few rehearsals of the band and being friends with Edith have made me a better person. I'm strong now, I don't need Daniel. 

Apparently, he knows this, too.

Realizing the importance of maintaining a friendship with him, at least for my mothers approval, I chose my words carefully. 

"You'll never lose me Daniel. We'll always have memories. It's just...things are tough for me right now at home and all." 

This seemed to distract Daniel from my evolution and he prompted me into conversation about my parents. 

"My dad...he's having an affair. My mom doesn't know." 

"God, Ophelia, I'm so sorry. I had no idea!" Daniel sputtered, wide eyed. irritation flared inside of me. Of course he had no idea, nobody had any idea. "Who is he seeing?" 

"Dunno. Someone in town, I reckon." I kept my gaze down, shrugging helplessly. Milking this drama would give me Daniel back and I could continue planning my trip to America. 

Sure enough, Daniel apologized for his behavior the other night and when tea and scones arrived I sat with him for an hour and talked- enough time to placate my mother. 

"You know, Ophelia. I'm glad you're in my life." Daniel told me as I was heading out the door. His naive smile made me feel sick and when I got to the cabin I tossed up the scones in the loo. 

I told mother that Daniel and I made up, I still have my ice cream job and it actually did feel nice to tell someone about dad. But all I can think about now, is how much Daniel will hurt when I leave at the end of summer.

-Ophelia ♡