Family Guy

Part 1: Drunken Mistake

The names Peter Griffin and I have this story that I feel that I need to share with you people of Quahag. So this is where i'll start the story of how my day had started. I was hanging out with Quagmire at the Hard Clam since Joe wasn't able to make it because of some fight he had gotten into with Bonnie. I didn't have much care though as I was busy getting drunk. "H..hey Quagmire". "*Giggle*. "Hey *Burp*..hey ..P..Peter whats up"? I wave my glass of alchohol around, "Haha have you ever noticed how Bonnie could be like that Indian lady Anju Kushwaha *BURRPP*. "Ha well never thought about it...how do you think that to be Peter? "Think about it Quagmire...Bonnie has been pregnant for god knows how long". "So my guess is..she'll give birth to 11 Indian kids also"."Ahh haha your right buddy I see". We clink our drinks. "Well here's a cheer for those future Indian Kids". "Yep" *CLINK*. "Time to head back Quagmire". "Ya hehe need to make sure poor Joe's not on the ground sobbing". The two of us leave the Hard Clam all drunk. "Ah man I think I may have overdone it today Peter". "Haha weakkkk!". We walk down a couple of streets before finally reaching ours, "Ah 31 Spooner Street". We start walking to Joe's when my phone starts buzzing,"Huh?". "What is it Pete?". I take out my phone and checked it. "Aw Crap its Lois". "Whats wrong with Lois". "I totally forgot our anniversary gift"."Ouch man...go and get something like a condom". *Giggity* *Giggity*. "Your right I need to get something...other than condom...I mean those things can easily snap and I doubt she'll appreciate it getting stuck in her". "Ok well see ya later buddy ok". "Ya see ya Quagmire". "Ok time to check on Joe". "*Giggity* *giggity*  *goo*. I open Joe's door as I noticed the lights were on. "Aw crap I'm so drunk". "Hehe". "Heyyy Joeeee Guess what Peter said". I waited a few seconds. "Peter says *Burp* Bonnies is fat with Indians". "Well thats all I wanted to say...also...Hehe Hard Clam tonight was hard on liquor so come back next week buddy". I close the door and walk to my house all drunk. I looked and noticed a fire hydrant. "Giggity, giggity". I walked over to it, took off my pants and took a long piss. "Ahhh". "That feels nice". With my pants pulled down I stumble over to my house. I open my door and close it behind me. I pass out drunk just as I closed the door. 

"THE NEXT DAY"

"HOLY CRAP". I wake up suprised. "GET THE HELL OVER HERE PETER". "Huh whats going on?". I stand up and walk to my door before falling down. *Omph*. "Ouch...oh ya Forgot my pants were down". I pulled them back on and got back up. "Crap! Joe what the hell are you doing!?". "Whats going on?". I quickly opened my door and ran out. I stood there shock as I see a bloody Peter running from Joe who looked to be very Enraged. "Fucking get over here goddamnit Peter!". "What did I do?!" *WHACK*. "Ow holy crap put that branch down Joe". I ran over and took the branch from Joe and stuck it in between his wheels causing him to fly off his seat. "Joe what the hell man...why are you beating Peter like that one guy beating on his friend because of a terrible joke?!". "Because someone told me yesterday that Peter got Bonnie pregnant with Indian kids". "Oh...". "Oh? What do you mean by oh?" "Uh nothing". "Now help me up Quagmire". I bend over to help Joe back up but just as I did..Peter walked up, turned around, pulled pants down, and farted in Joe's face. "Holy crap Peter! Why did you do that". "Cause that bastard thinks he can walk into my house and beat me with a stick...I only let Lois do that...but in different situations". I look over at Joe and noticed that he had a sad and disappointed look on his face. "Joe? You ok buddy?" "No..Its official."Whats official?". "Peter is no longer a friend...but my enemy". "A frenemy?". "No...just an enemy". Joe turns his wheelchair around and goes back into his house. "Uh Peter?". "What Quagmire?". "Since I was really drunk yesterday I may have...um.". "May have what?". "May have told him that you got Bonnie pregnant with Indian kids". "YOU SON OF A...!" *PUNCH*. I went to the ground bleeding. "I don't want you talking to me till Joe starts talking to me". "So go tell him what you did". Peter storms off back into his house. I lay there on the ground bloody. I tear up.."How am I going to fix this?". I cried the rest of the day while laying on the ground still bloody. "I need to fix this and quickly". I get up and finally head back into my house. (I don't want to lose my best friends). With a determined look I finally decided to do something about it. "I can do this". *Giggle*. I turned around and saw a pretty lady laying on my bed waiting for me. *Giggity* *Giggity* But first....I have other business. And from that day on neither Joe or Peter would talk to me and I know I need to fix this. But in another story ;). TO BE CONTINUED...