Addicted To You (TO BE PUBLISHED)

20

I spent the last hour cleaning the apartment. This is a task that usually occurs when I'm anxious about something. It is like an adrenaline rush for me to clean everything. Aunt Claudia says I got it from my mom. She had significant OCD along with mental health issues. However, Claudia blames it on my father.

I remember the days when she would come home from work and anxiously scrub everything as if it was not clean already. Her nervousness rubbed off on me, making me feel like I must second-guess everything. Like the day before Nolan and I went on our first date, I debated whether it was a good idea to date him.

Four years later and the thought comes lingering back.

I came across a teddy bear that had been on the couch for weeks since my first week, and no one touched it. I've been itching to move it, but I don't know who it belongs to. So I knock on Delilah's door with it in hand.

My eyes grew in shock to see Rose in front of me instead of Delilah. "I'm surprised to see you here." 

"Delilah got stupid drunk last night, so I just brought her here and slept over." But, for some reason, I have the feeling it is something more, they have been spending time together a lot, and even before I got to know them better, they were super close to each other all the time.

I smile instead and hand her the bear. "I think this belongs to her; I'm just cleaning up the place."

"I'll make sure to give it to her."

Hours later, I had a fresh apartment that doesn't smell like weed and cigarettes. When I sat in bed to relax I got Claudia's phone call. I haven't heard from her in a whole week, it is scary.

"I miss home so much," I tell her.

"I miss you too, Milly." She sighs. "There are some things I need to talk to you about, though. I was hoping we can talk in person, so I'll visit; ok?"

I wish she can say it now, so I at least have relief from one thing. "Are you sure you don't want to tell me over the phone?"

"I think you'll appreciate it more if we talk in person. We'll talk soon." She hangs up before I can even say bye to her.

Once our short conversation came to an end, I walked back out to the living area only to find the damn teddy bear back where it was.

I turn to find Delilah in the kitchen.

"Hey," I call out.

"Oh hey, I didn't see you there." She looks beat.

I point to the teddy bear. "Is that yours?"

She shakes her head and smiles. "No, it's Trixi's I put it back because she doesn't like people touching and moving her stuff. I just saved your life."

I laugh and so does she. "Thanks... I guess. I only moved it because it looks so creepy there. Like it's staring at us." I look back at the creepy bear.

"Trust me, I feel the same way. How are you holding up? Have you seen Chase, he's back." I think back to two days ago when we were in my room together.

"We haven't talked as much; I'm trying to avoid him."

"I have a serious question, and I don't want you to feel like you can't trust me." she gets closer. "Do you like him?" In my head, I am telling her no, but right now I am stuck with no words.

"No, I don't." She lifts her left eyebrow, "With all the girls he sleeps with he probably has AIDS or something." I lie again. She is best friends with the other women why would I tell her. Trixi sent her to ask me.

"You hesitated." She points her finger at me and her mouth gaps. I really must be better with my poker faces. "You really like him, what about Nolan?" My mouth is open, but I cannot say anything.