Say Goodbye (a Selection story)

Chapter Nine

I follow Jay into his apartment, slightly in question if it was a good idea to come here. After all we only just met and I've had too many encounters with men trying to become my new man. But this is just dinner...right?

I look around to find that his place very well kept and organized. Most men don't have that and it's nice to see. Everything also looks very modern and you can tell he has quite a lot of money but doesn't flaunt it too to the point where it's extravagant. I smile as I think of Celeste Newsome who would undoubtedly disapprove not showing off how much money you have. She was by far the most extravagant person I know and shockingly one of my closest friends from the Selection.

"That smile isn't you laughing at my place is it?"

I blush as Jay's words bring me back from my thoughts. "Not at all. Your apartment is actually quite nice."

" Well that's good to hear," Jay says with a smile. Gosh his smile is attractive. "I do have to say, however, I am not the greatest cook out there. Definitely won't compare to anything you've probably had at the palace."

The mention of the palace immediately takes any smile off my face. Jay notices and apologizes. "I'm sorry. I probably shouldn't mention any of that."

"No worries. It was just a period of time that can be forgotten," I say, failing to hiding the sadness in my voice.

"Then it will be forgotten and never mentioned again. Now, we shall begin the process of my completely embarrassing myself in front of my new partner by attempting to cook." Jay walks over to his small kitchen and grabs a ladle from a drawer, "You use this to measure right?"

I laugh as I walk over to him, "How about we cook together so there's at least some experience making this meal?"

"Yeah that would probably be the best option," Jay says with a smile.

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As I walk into my apartment, I have a feeling I have not felt in quite some time: happy. I enjoyed myself tonight more than I thought I would. Cooking with Jay was surprising fun. He had no idea what he was doing which was entertaining, but it was a good time. He didn't push me for personal information and he stayed away from palace talk unlike most people.

What scares me is the feeling I have that is more than happiness. It feels in a way like an attraction which I cannot allow. Jay is a wonderful man but I cannot allow myself to fall for anyone now.

Or ever.