Most girls dream about their wedding, I was not one of those girls. I saw my name in shiny lights as I belted my heart out to a packed stadium with an original song. For as long as I can remember the only thing I had ever truly loved, the only thing that made me happy, that mattered at all was writing and singing.
From the age of five to twenty, there was never a doubt in my mind of where I wanted my life to go. As I got older my dreams seemed more far fetched. "You're not good enough, You're not pretty enough, " you hear those two words "not enough, " so many damn times you start to believe it. Like a never-ending chorus of your failures plaguing your life like a poison.
I never felt like Texas was my home, I never once felt settled or any resemblance of happiness. And Texas seemed to feel the same about me. I was always too much, "you're too hyper, you talk too much, you're too playful." Somehow I was always too much but never enough.
My mistakes gleamed on my skin like a scarlet letter, my family never let me forget them. Looking back on it now there was nothing wrong with who I was, it was their problem, not mine but try telling that to a child who's only heard of her negatives. Never her strengths, no I had to find those within myself.
All I could think about was leaving this place in my dust, when I turned eighteen I was so gone. Leaving everyone to the wind my heels kicked up as I slammed the door on my way out.
Then eighteen came and went but I didn't. The one thing that seems to stand in the way of everyone's dreams... money. It takes money to leave, it takes money to do anything and I had none of it. I was trapped.
Nineteen came and went and soon I was twenty, being happy on the outside but completely destroyed on the inside. I never wanted anything more than to see my name in those shiny lights, to leave this town and never return and then he came into my store. I have always prided myself on being a fiercely independent woman who never needed a man.
But the boy with the long dark chestnut hair and even darker eyes stole my heart all the same. For once I wasn't too much, I was more than enough. He called me perfect once, and it settled in my heart sealing all the cracks the words from my childhood had left scarred on every part of me like a tattoo.
I saw my name in those shiny lights and now? I see my dreams through his eyes as he has a firm grasp on my hand and heart forever.
