A/N Just needed a place to vent my feelings once again
It's been more than a few years now
I've been stuck reminiscing in my feelings for too long
I guess that hearing that you didn't love me anymore
really messed me up
It broke me into a million jagged pieces
I was left so broken I couldn't even recognize myself
When I said that I loved you
I guess that I didn't realize what I was giving up
I wore my heart on my sleeve
I gave you my all
They all called it puppy love
I opened my heart to you
I gave you the keys
I told you my secrets
I opened up my soul
I told you everything that you needed to know
I was so young
I was so fucking stupid
I was such an Idiot
and I hate myself for it
but if I had the choice to do it all over again
I would, because I have no regrets
even though I went through so much pain
and it took me four goddamn years to pick up all the broken pieces
When I said I loved you I had no idea what I was getting myself into
When I heard you say the words I thought where only for my ears to someone else
I understood, I really did
she was a better version of me
the perfect woman for a man
everybody loved her
So I understand why you fell in love with her
and out of love with me
and even though it hurt
I'm happy to say that I'm finally letting go of everything that is you
I'm ridding myself of the memories
of my feelings and the part of me that you created
I'm cleansing myself from the pain
and putting the jagged pieces together again
I know that I said that I would never stop loving you
and that might be true
because even though I'm ready to fix myself again
I know that I will probably never stop loving you
at least I know I will fix myself
I promise that I will
but a tiny piece of me will stay broken to remind me of you
my first love.
